The weird and the wonderful in politics: Not so honourable member

2013-06-09 14:00

Smelly measures

A small town in Spain has found a way of punishing the owners of dogs that foul on the pavement: put the stuff in a box and post it back to the owner.

Western Cape Premier Helen Zille tweeted this week that this might just be the solution to the province’s dirty politics, which saw human faeces delivered on her office steps.

But Siyahleba’s spies in Zillestan say the province’s leaders aren’t taking any chances.

She was accompanied by ample security this week when attending meetings in areas where more of these offensive offences could occur.

Eye on the, er, ball

At his leaving do this week, British High Commission communications head Garyn Benham spilt some of the state secrets created during his posting in South Africa.

One of these related to Prince Charles’s visit in 2011.

The prince went to see some of his royal counterparts in rural KwaZulu-Natal, where a dancing troupe of bare-breasted Zulu women welcomed him and wife Camilla.

Benham realised the tabloid photographers present would love a pic of a gawping prince, so he kept the prince’s eye on the ball to avoid a royal embarrassment.

Siyahleba knows of a few local politicians who could relish that level of service.

Not so honourable member

Some of South Africa’s mayors aren’t really covering themselves in glory.

In fact, Cederberg mayor Jonas White covered parts of himself in cream and topped it with a strawberry.

White apparently SMSed a picture of his dressed-up member to his deputy in 2011 and after a, uhm, lengthy disciplinary process was rightly kicked out of his position by the ANC this week.

It must have been an interesting hearing though because surely the ANC should have asked for some kind of evidence to be put on the table.

How else would they have been able to verify that the member on the texted picture did, in fact, belong to the honourable member?

Taking the mickey

The SA National Roads Agency has put the cart before the e-tolls by accepting an international toll excellence award for its technology, through which they have, presumably, quietly been spying on cars.

DA MP Ian Ollis has slammed the agency for accepting a “Mickey Mouse award”, which made Siyahleba think about the Comrades runner who upset a little boy by snatching his toy Mickey Mouse for good luck.

The runner finished the Comrades, but it’s yet to be seen if e-tolls will ever see its own finish line.

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