The weird world of politics: Double-0 Gupta

2013-05-19 14:00

Cold comfort

When he was still in favour and campaigning for green, black and gold votes in 2009, young lion Julius Malema warned those leaving for Cope that it’s cold outside the ANC.

But cold is not always a bad thing, especially if it’s something you’re licking. A tweeter spotted him and a friend at the Sandton Milky Lane eating ice cream and reckoned it was a funny sight. It’s not, really.

Who doesn’t like ice cream? But it’s also a far cry from the days when he was sipping those expensive single malts.

Let them eat cake

While mine workers’ union NUM is haemorrhaging members to rival union Amcu, with which it is on the brink of a hot war, another rival union is having a party.

Metal workers’ union Numsa, which has been accused by the mining lot of nabbing some of their members, had a cake-cutting ceremony in Joburg this week to celebrate its 26th birthday.

It is also launching a campaign to recruit 80?000 more members by 2016 to raise its membership to 400?000. The union boasts in its press invite that it is “the fastest-growing trade union of Cosatu amid serious ideological offensives and threats”.

Their smugness is almost starting to reach Kenny Kunene proportions.

ANC bucks the Bucs

ANC members have stopped making the divisive football hand signs that were all the rage at their conference in Mangaung last year, but spokesperson Jackson Mthembu is at it again.

This week, he issued a glowing statement about the winners of the Premier Soccer League. On behalf of the ANC, he congratulated Kaizer Chiefs on their success, saying “the team indeed reclaimed its glory, led ably by the proficient and united technical team of Stuart Baxter and Doctor Khumalo”.

He goes on to say that sport unites South Africans across different persuasions and backgrounds. You have to wonder if they’ve heard of a team called Pirates, or met any of their fans.

Double-0 Gupta

If you thought movies are all fiction, think again. The 1997 James Bond movie Tomorrow Never Dies may prove to have been prophetic.

In it there is a character named, well, Mr Gupta, who talks about what he calls “Gupta’s law of convenient anomalies”. He says: “If it looks too good to be true, it probably is.”

If this other, less fictional, Gupta family heeded his advice before they decided to ask for special rules to conveniently land their wedding plane at Waterkloof air force base, they’d have saved themselves a few tears.

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