The weird world of politics: The real chief of sarcasm

2013-08-04 14:00

Nation for old men

Don’t let the peace talks of the observer missions fool you.

Zimbabwe’s elections were rough.

First, there was Olusegun Obasanjo, the African Union mission head and former Nigerian president, who did not need an army of bodyguards to look after him.

Instead, he offered to “bite your hand” to a journalist who was asking questions out of place. Similarly, Uncle Bob Mugabe twice offered to “box” journalists who asked questions about his 89 years of age.

With his stamina, Siyahleba would rather steer well clear of his fists.

The realchief of sarcasm

Zimbabwe’s President Robert Mugabe has perfected sarcasm as a way of dodging the difficult questions – the same type that is often also seen done by politicians in South Africa.

This week, after summoning journalists at the last minute to a rare press conference, he made them wait after he made them run.

A journalist from a French radio station asked him if it’s true that chiefs were intimidating voters in the rural areas.

A stupid question deserves a silly answer, so Uncle Bob said: “You know, the rural areas also have lions and elephants. You might have mistaken them for chiefs.”

Wailing for good news

President Jacob Zuma must be tired of watching news about his Nkandla residence each time he switches on his telly.

He told the launch of the SABC 24-hour news channel that there was a need

for news beyond the staple fare of crime and corruption that dominates headlines.

“We would like to be introduced to ordinary South Africans, their experiences and what they do on a day-to-day basis to make this country succeed, in all corners of our land. The true and full South African story is waiting to be told,” Zuma said.

Maybe, we’ll also hear the true story of the Nkandla millions.

Geography lessons

The acting chief operations officer of the SABC, Hlaudi Motsoeneng, was in his element as usual.

Apart from disparaging the prophets of doom who thought the long-awaited channel would never take off, Motsoeneng succinctly explained what the channel is all about.

“We can cross to any country in Africa, including New York,” he said. Clearly, Motsoeneng flunked geography at school.

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