Grieving wife vs grieving mistress

2014-10-30 00:00

ON Monday, KZN and the rest of South Africa woke up to the news that an Umlazi-born hero and father, Senzo Meyiwa, was no longer.

The Bafana Bafana goalkeeper had been shot and killed in Johannesburg after an alleged robbery at his mistress Kelly Khumalo’s house. It has been reported that Meyiwa was shot while trying to protect Khumalo from thugs.

It’s also been said that Meyiwa was going to leave Khumalo’s house later that evening to meet up with his wife at a party but he never arrived.

I was heartbroken at how Khumalo was called his “girlfriend” by most of the media when the news broke, and yet this man had a wife whose heart was clearly broken by a cheating husband.

As a recently married woman, this broke my heart knowing that even in his death, Khumalo was the one getting all the sympathy and acknowledgement, even though Meyiwa had left behind his legitimate family without much mention of this in media reports.

As much as I sympathise with Khumalo having been the one he was trying to protect at her home, and I also feel pain for the child Meyiwa and Khumalo shared, I can only imagine the sadness and pain the woman he was traditionally married to is now experiencing.

My heart aches for the late Pirates’ goalkeeper’s children from this marriage, which makes the entire story so heart-breaking.

Not only am I saddened by the senseless murder of Meyiwa, but I’m also saddened at the breakdown of his marriage and the public nature of his affair with Khumalo.

His wife is mourning the death of her husband, but she is also mourning the fact that her husband’s dying moments were probably spent in the arms of his mistress — something that would gut me to my core if I was ever in her position.

Her husband’s affair was very well-publicised, with Meyiwa and Khumalo attending public events together and flaunting their affair in clear view of his wife’s family and friends.

This was so prevalent that so many people who I have spoken to over the past couple of days had no idea that Meyiwa was even married.

On the flip side, here is a woman who has had a public affair with a married man and has even gone so far as to get arrested for assault after attacking his wife last year in Johannesburg.

Khumalo also shares a child with convicted culpable homicide criminal and musician Jub Jub.

Their relationship ended publically after Jub Jub was imprisoned.

I can’t imagine what could be going through Khumalo’s mind at this moment as she looks back at the fate of both her children’s fathers.

One is dead and the other is serving an eight-year jail term for killing children while drunk and high behind the wheel of a car.

She probably heard the last words that came out of Meyiwa’s mouth as he lay dying and only she knows what those words were.

I can only imagine the guilt that runs through her veins knowing that he died trying to protect her, and the sadness that she feels thinking this all happened at her home.

This is such a tragic story — a tale of infidelity and a horrible ending to a public love affair in which a sporting hero’s life was taken for a cellphone.

This heart-rending tragedy further highlights how crime has gripped our communities and criminals have no care for human life.

The world watches once again as South Africa tries to put the pieces together of yet another murder involving a high-profile individual.

My prayers and thoughts go out to all who knew and loved Meyiwa.

May his soul rest in peace.

• Catch Carol Ralefeta on East Coast Radio, Saturdays and Sundays, 10 am to 2 pm.

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