Would you marry for money?

2012-02-27 00:00

LAST night I found myself in a reluctant conversation with a group of pretty, young, single women. I’m saying “reluctant” because a) I was hungry and the food smells from the kitchen were making my mouth water like a rabid dog’s, b) there was nowhere to sit and I was wearing heels, and most importantly, c) I was horrified at the topic.

“I’m going to go work on a yacht for a year because apparently that is how you meet rich men,” said a recently qualified lawyer without irony or shame.

“But what about James?” I asked naively. I had met James before and thought he was pretty hot.

“James?” she scoffed. “James is sweet but he will never amount to anything.”

“Goodness yes,” agreed one of the other girls. “I’m afraid I would never marry a man who didn’t have money.”

“I just hope I don’t fall in love with a pauper because then I’d have to break my own heart!”

Cue laughter.

Feeling very young and very unlike my normal cynical self I went home with Charles soon afterwards. Driving back to my modest though lovely house, in my 16-year-old car I wondered if Charles’s earning potential had any­thing to do with why I married him.

Are we genetically programmed to look for mates who will support our young? Have aeons of forced dependency on men left an indelible mark on our psyche? Do we honestly feel it is our right to be looked after because we are the weaker or fairer sex? Or do we just want to buy a lot of shoes and live a life of leisure and luxury?

I know of women who make R80 000 and upwards a month, basically working for Satan, who just cannot forgive or respect their schoolteacher husbands. Surely this is wrong?

Can we be equal people who are proud and independent, and still expect him to earn more? And don’t men deserve to be looked after too?

I don’t know. I have never been in a situation where love went out the window because poverty walked in the door so I don’t want to judge. But my mother did tell me that if you marry for money, you will earn every cent.

— News 24.com

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