David Moseley

Be more committed

2012-08-07 09:22

David Moseley

In the last few weeks we’ve heard a lot about commitment. All our Olympic gold medalists have spoken about how they’ve “committed” large chunks of their lives to training and preparing for these Games. Almost all Olympic athletes caught on screen before or after an event will have something similar to say.

As viewers we nod our heads in charmed approval because we know what this means. We know that our successful swimmers and rowing gents, along with every other athlete competing at London 2012, train like monks, dedicated solely to their craft and the pursuit of excellence.

We nod in awed approval at their dedication, and possibly wonder out loud “why can’t our meathead politicians be this committed to excellence, rather than simply going for gold”. We admire the sacrifice of these athletes and hope for one tenth of their dedication to rub off in our everyday lives.

Commit, commit

Of course, commitment and dedication are familiar buzzwords when it comes to any activity, none more so than relationships. And with five months to go before my wedding I can’t help but feel that some Olympic athletes are talking directly to me, adding knowing winks when bringing up terms like “dedication”, “hard work”, “long term” and, allegedly man’s most terrifying word, “commitment”.

Commitment has never been something that’s put me off (despite one or two ungrateful women abusing my gullibility for romantic dedication in the past), but this year I’ve become a learned and more appreciative man in the dark arts of relationship commitment.

You see, commitment to your partner doesn’t start and end when handing over the engagement ring, or saying “I do” under an oak tree while mother blubbers in the background. It’s not even about the grand gestures of nights at luxury hotels or the promise of exquisite gifts.

No, commitment is smaller, subtle, more understated. Commitment is sitting on the couch until your eyes can bear the harsh glare of energy saving bulbs no more while your fiancée completes her studies homework. Commitment is enthusiastically piping up every 30 minutes or so during the homework, even as you nod off, “almost done, keep at it, nearly bedtime” to keep waning spirits high. Commitment is support.

Making her smile

Commitment is waking up one morning to make Robyn coffee before work (hours before I have to anywhere near appropriately attired for the day), and then continuing to do so for 300 consecutive days (still ongoing!) because you realise this makes her happy and starts her day with a grin.

Commitment is coming home late from work with a weekend’s worth of dishes tormenting your lazy Monday evening idyll, and getting stuck in straight away because you know that your fiancée has better things to do, like learning how to create sustainable energy that will one day save all the polar bears.

Commitment is the inconsequential coming home 10 minutes early from a boozy boys lunch to water the garden or make the bed. It’s the surprise cup of coffee, the early morning naked dance of enthusiasm to encourage your sleepy partner out of bed, the tearful shopping for wedding serviettes that take all Sunday and suffering through Love, Actually for the 12th time.

Commitment is all the little things that make her smile. 

- Follow @david_moseley on Twitter.

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