Give that girl a bike

2011-11-15 10:17

David Moseley

I’m plagiarising myself here slightly, because what you’re about to read I’ve already written (not exactly, but something quite similar) in a magazine. The words are different, but the sentiment is the same, so if any of you voracious online and magazine consumers get a sense of déjà vu, I apologise.

This past weekend I took part in the Contego Wines2Whales with Robyn. It’s a 223km, three-day mountain bike race from Lourensford Wine Estate in Somerset West to Onrus, just outside Hermanus.

It’s the second Wines2Whales we’ve done and the fourth multi-day stage race we’ve attempted in total. While featuring nothing like the brutality of the Absa Cape Epic, it’s still a test to get from start to finish for the average rider (of which I am incredibly average). To me, though, there is also no better test of your relationship.

Magic in the mountains

I do these races with Robyn because we both enjoy mountain biking, but I also agree to participate with her because I’m secretly trying to learn everything about her before the relationship takes the next step (no mom, no proposal yet, so don’t book that ticket to South Africa).

I find by cycling together I can learn more about her in three gruelling days of a stage race than you could in a lifetime of drunken evenings of getting to “know” each other.

After last year’s Wines2Whales I wrote, “Forget facial hair in the bathroom stink, wet towels on the bed or pink disposable razors slicing into your toes on the shower floor.

“If you want to put your relationship through the ultimate tension test try surviving sleepless nights in a tent, lung-busting hills, punctured tyres, cut-off times, and more lube than should ever be deemed tasteful in the early stages of a blossoming relationship.

If you can survive a three-day mountain bike race with your partner, your relationship will survive anything that life can throw at you. Except low-lying branches. There’s just no escaping those.”

Now I must confess, in 2011 we stayed far away from the camping aspect of the race, and in our cycling experience we’ve moved away from tubes and towards tubeless tyres. But the hills, lube, frustration of mechanical failures, irritation at misfiring teammates and low-lying branches we’re all still present during this weekend’s Wines2Whales race. The learning and enjoyment was there too.

She’s a winner

Take our different approaches to races for instance. I want to survive, Robyn wants to win. Now it’s pretty difficult to win one of these things when you’re in the H group (and A, B, C etc have all started before you), so to her when someone in batch H, I or J attempts to overtake it’s a personal affront and that person (or persons) must be dealt with in the most severe manner possible.

In fact, there is a group of Pretoria gentlemen still reeling from the shock of being obliterated with 5km on Day Two of the Wines2Whales last Saturday. They’d held Robyn up on the single-track climbs (a particular strength of hers) and then sped off on the jeep track (clearly roadies in disguise), creating a frustrating concertina-like effect on our momentum. By the end of day Two, she’d had enough.

As we passed the 5km-to-go board I knew what was coming. This, gentlemen, is from experience. She looked at me and my heart sank as any thoughts of a nice, easy amble to finish faded.

Her bike clicked ominously into a heavier gear and the hammer was well and truly put down. After 70km of cruising on Day One and 65km of relaxing on day Two, she now wanted to race.

Into the wind and up the final hills she hunted these poor buggers (me in tow, breathlessly apologising to the more mellow finishers of the day) only to whizz past her targets with a cheery wave. Groans filled the countryside air, and dagger looks darted in my direction as the men realised a tiny, yet amply-calfed female mountain biker had beaten them to the punch.

From mountain biking with Robyn I’ve learnt she’s as clumsy as hell (if there’s a deceptively stationary tree in the way, she’ll hit it), her confidence takes a while to kick (if she passes one person, she’ll want to pass the rest), but more than anything she’s a winner. And that’s the kind of person you can always bank on.

Besides, sometimes it helps to get your butt kicked by a girl. It makes you a better man. Certainly, a more committed one.

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