Khaya Dlanga

So you don’t believe in Bafana?

2010-06-01 11:00

In a little over a week, the FIFA Soccer World Cup will be taking place in our backyard. Hundreds of thousands of fans will make their way into the country. How apt, the world’s oldest human fossils have been found in South Africa. I guess this means that the world is coming home. And at home they shall feel.

I’m not just expecting African Americans to kiss the ground and shout, “I’m in the motherland!” I’m expecting everyone to, including white people and Chinese people. They will all be in the motherland. It’s time the rest of world realised that this too is home for them. This ladies and gentlemen is humanity’s Garden of Eden.

The only people who shouldn’t feel at home are the teams that will be playing Bafana. Like most human beings I am not a supporter of crime or of cruelty, but there is a form of cruelty I am expecting, and that is Bafana dismembering the world’s teams. That I support fully. What Bafana Bafana did to Guatamala yesterday was cruel. It was in the proportions of Christian vs Lions in the Colosseum in Rome. And it was beautiful to watch.

Bafana is starting to believe and so is the nation. I was happy to see that they have stopped drawing; they are beginning to realise that the football field is not art class. They are winning. Some may say that we are playing against weak opposition. Not all the teams we played were weak. We have done very well. Even if the teams were weak for arguments sake, we never even used to win against weak opposition. Now we are.

I would like to warn us against setting low expectations for ourselves as a nation. Some amongst us have written us off. For them the highest bar is going to the second round. What sort of expectations are those? If this is the mindset we insist on having then we should realise that we have defeated ourselves well before we have set foot on the pitch. We are the host nations. We are South Africa, a country that has produced the world’s best golfers outside of America, we have produced a Formula1 world champion, we have won the Rugby World Cup twice and are winners of the Tri Nation, not only that, but we have won the African Cup of Nations.

So who is to say we should have low expectations? I refuse to accept that and so should you. We have done many impossible things as a nation and I’m not about to get into them. You know them and I know them. Heck, we did a couple of impossible things two weeks in a row; a Super 14 semi-final and a final in Soweto. And the world’s best rugby team is a South African team.

One more thing we realise is that we don’t need Benni McDonald’s. He has treated the country as if he is doing us a favour by gracing his enormous body with a Bafana jersey. Incidentally, when I wore a Bafana jersey my body resembled that of Benni. Perhaps his arrogance towards the nation manifested itself as fat. Playing for one’s nation is a privilege not a right. Yes he achieved many great things for the country, scoring many goals for it and for that we are eternally grateful, but we are not pleased by his behaviour.

They couldn’t make the Bafana jerseys any bigger for Benni so they left him out of the squad instead.

Allow me an aside to Benni here:

Dear Benni,

I apologise for the fat jokes. I just couldn’t resist. Before the arrogance set in you were great. We still respect what you did and who you were. We don’t want to remember you for what you used to be, we also want to remember you for who you can become.  Your legacy should not be your arrogance or your weight. These are the last years of your career.

You have been left out and you only have yourself to blame. You have been given one chance after another. Our patience has worn thin. I hope we remember you for more than your disservice to the country. Please make us remember you for what we should remember you for instead. How? I don’t know but try.

A fan, Khaya Dlanga


Now back to the column. And remember, we have our secret yet very loud weapon, the Vuvuzela. The Vuvuzela is like our trumpet that the Israelites used while they marched seven times around the city of Jericho and the walls of the great city came tumbling down. The Vuvuzela is the mighty weapon which will cause these great teams to crumble as we lay them to waste. The Vuvuzela is mightier than the boot.

And oh, I refuse to learn the Diski Dance. It's impossible to look cool while doing the Diski Dance. Even Michael Jackson wouldn't have pulled it off.

South Africa this is our moment. It is a defining moment not just for the country or the continent; it is a defining moment for the world. Let’s enjoy this momentous occasion and make future generations proud. If you think that it impossible for Bafana to go beyond the second round, remember these words: there is possible in impossible.

- Follow Khaya on Twitter.

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Read more on:    fifa  |  benni mccarthy  |  khaya dlanga
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