A sporting chance

2007-05-29 09:05

David Moseley

While everyone agrees that politics and sport mix like liquid petroleum gas and a faulty flame thrower, it seems that opinion is divided on the apparent symbiosis between God and sport.

If God is omnipresent then surely he is as present on the sports field as he is in the church. It's clear, though, that like everyone else when it comes to sporting competitions, he definitely has his favourites. Maradona, anyone?

Two Saturdays ago, Jaco van der Westhuyzen's body was powerfully infused with the Holy Spirit, as was every picture of the victorious Bulls team, (had he been interviewed after the Super 14 final I'm sure the exchange would have involved the Bull's player sprouting forth in tongues).

A few days later the AC Milan midfielder Kaka celebrated his triumph and faith in a more subdued salute to the Almighty with a t-shirt that read "I belong to Jesus" (which in no way is connected to the Scottish ditty "I belong to Glasgow, Glasgow belongs to me").

But after both of these celebrations it's clear that some of the very best in sport do believe in a connection between the two.

It's not without coincidence, either, that some of South Africa's top rugby players are quick to thank God (and Nokia) for their man-of-the-match abilities and prizes. These powerful men know that behind their strength lies an even greater power.

Pick and choose your sport

What I particularly enjoy is Bakkies Botha going down on his knees before a match or pointing meaningfully to the Heavens after scoring a try when, in between it all, he's usually responsible for at least six of the 15 late tackles that occur while he's on the field.

Even more impressive is Pakistan batsman Mohammad Yousuf's career rise under the watchful eye of a mightier steward than your ordinary coach.

Before converting to Islam, Yousuf was the only Christian in the Pakistan team. After he switched faith, Yousuf embarked on a run-scoring spree that yielded nine Test centuries and almost 2000 runs in a year.

After notching up his impressive record he told the BBC, "It was only with God's help that I achieved this." I'm sure the late Bob Woolmer was more than a little miffed at the time to not receive any recognition for sculpting Yousuf's elegant style at the crease.

From this we can only deduce that Allah is more in tune with the somnolent stylings of Test cricket while the Christian God prefers the more frenetic sporting pursuits of rugby and football. I'm not too sure what his stance is on motor sport.

Going the (long) distance

I can tell you emphatically, however, that he's not a marathon man. On Saturday I was a willing participant in the Darling half-marathon. Just before the start of the race a gentleman who I assume was of significant importance (he raised only his hand to silence the murmuring crowd. He also had the biggest gun) led the expectant runners in prayer.

It was a novel start to a half-marathon indeed. He read from the good book a passage about the body being the Holy Spirit's temple and how we should honour God with our bodies. I duly agreed and silently promised that I would duly sacrifice a few Heinekens at the alter of my temple on completion of the 21kms.

With that flippant remark I can now confirm that God indeed holds sway in the outcome of sporting events. For the entire race my body was racked with pain, while my legs felt like the devil himself was poking them with his fiery trident. I finished with blistered feet and an aching back.

Moral of the story? Bakkies may hit you late, but at least he always gets to the church on time.

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