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Georgina Guedes

A toilet for your bride

2009-10-29 10:21

When I picked my life partner, there were certain things that were important to me. I wanted a man who respected me, who made me a priority in his life, who was clever, funny and kind and who was willing and able to share in the cooking and cleaning.

A story on CNN today brought home to me, once again, the vast cultural differences that exist on our planet. One of the questions that Indian brides' mothers ask when arranging their marriages is whether the village where their daughters will be sent to live have a latrine in which she can relieve herself.

Aside from the luxury that we Westernised women have in being able to play the field a little before marriage, select our own partners and arrange our own unions - the toilet as a deal breaker had never occurred to me.

I'm not some cloistered Sandtonite either. I've travelled extensively in some pretty remote places, and my worst toilet experience is pretty spectacularly awful (overflowing squat loos that filtered down into a space beneath the crack-ridden and seeping concrete floor in a bus station in the north of Peru), but I haven't yet been to an area that has no toilet at all.

Granted, I've never travelled in India (it's on the list). According to the CNN article, India needs to construct 112 000 toilets a day to meet its sanitation goals for 2012. That's a shed-load of loos. Until then, in many villages, women wait until sunset when they can relieve themselves in darkness, or walk far into the fields for some privacy.

So mothers are getting involved, and making the presence of a toilet a priority for prospective husbands wanting to whisk their virgin daughters away to a place of matrimonial, but often toilet-free bliss.

Now, I have relieved myself in squat loos in bamboo shelters in the jungle or in cubicles high up in fig trees in the Laotian forests, or even in filthy loos in filling stations in the UK (far less sanitary and pristine than one might think), so I have a great appreciation for a sit-down toilet, a closing door and an efficient flushing mechanism.

At the same time, I've had some of the best experiences of my life in places without such amenities, and if I had to choose between a flushing toilet and the man I love, the man I love would come out on top every time. But I guess when the choice is being made between one dowry-hungry stranger and the next, the basic amenities are as good a consideration as any other.

One more reason to count our blessings every day, my Western sisters.

- Georgina Guedes is a freelance journalist. She thinks it's funny that "two and a half bathrooms, main en suite" is the rallying cry of house hunters in her circle of friends.

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Disclaimer: News24 encourages freedom of speech and the expression of diverse views. The views of columnists published on News24 are therefore their own and do not necessarily represent the views of News24.

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Comment on this story


jenny 10/29/2009 11:59:31 AM
I also found the UK toilets disgusting, even Heathrow was a disappointment. But then again, London was recently voted Europe's Filthiest City and I can vouch for that!! I go over every year to my family and each year I am increasingly disgusted!

fullmoon 10/29/2009 12:01:12 PM
Well aren't you so lucky to be so well travelled. But how do you know you chose your life partner, maybe he chose you?

IZ 10/29/2009 12:03:04 PM
Very enjoyable column! A flushing loo really is a luxury. Busy maket loo in Dar es Salaam comes to mind as my worst experience....awful, and I still had to pay R2 to go in.

Eureka! 10/29/2009 12:22:12 PM
@jenny As the saying goes... The safest place in the UK is under a bar of soap. They simply never get picked up! For anyone going to Bali, try using the toilets at the Monkey Forest. It WILL leave an ... ermmm ... taste in your mouth.

Man but the most funny toilet experience i've had was at the airport in Singapore about 10 years ago when the use of auto-flush toilet was in its infancy. It had a motion detector much and when you got up, it should auto-flush. Not so with the cubicle that I chose! The damn thing flush every few seconds. What a washout!

Dirk 10/29/2009 12:48:07 PM
One should be careful to compare western values to what people do and experience in India. One truly starts to understand and value the Indian culture only after working and living amongst them. Indian people quite often find the western way of dating, courtship etc. as immoral and many of them look down on our western customs. Many if not most marriages in India are arranged and parents go to great lengths to find the right husband or wife for their children. Many Indian people are quite proud of the way their parents found their partner and can bore you with endless stories if you prompt them. It is not as if the children have no say in the matter - it is just a case of the parent taking a lead in the affairs.

BT 10/29/2009 12:55:18 PM
All the more reason why the world needs to get very serious about curbing population growth. Can you imagine if we all end up in a situation where, because of overpopulation and water shortages, a simple and natural act as going to the loo, becomes an ultimate luxury?

DeeJay 10/29/2009 12:59:59 PM
Georgina, I travelled to India recently and was shocked at the experience. A local newspaper clipping confirmed my experience - more than 60% of Indians live on less than 20 Rupees - about R3 a day (got a pic of the clipping as proof). Again, shocking. Can understand why a thing as "simple" as a toilet could be important.

Kusie 10/29/2009 1:02:41 PM
Its a pity we never asked my sister's husband if they had a proper toilet bcoz we struggled a bit when we had to take my sister to her new home in Willowvale (Trankei) in the Easter Cape.I'm saying we struggled a bit bcoz as soon as we understood the situation one had to dig deep into your teenage years (growing up in Newlands - Eastern Cape) and imagine how liberating it was to go to the bush when you want to relieve yourself.

Deejay 10/29/2009 1:04:57 PM
By the way, while in India I was amused by a very amaturish TV channel having a show where a "ghuru" shared his wisdom via "spokesman". A pearl was when the "spokesman" ranted about the evil and risks of the westernised nations that dared to wipe themslves with paper. The scriptures explicitly says you only clean yourself with WATER.

Tanisha 10/29/2009 1:05:30 PM
I think what's saddest is that so many women in India still do not have a say in their futures. And while it may be considerate of the parents to at least want their daughter to be able to use a proper toilet while married...I don't see how that compensates for having to spend the rest of your life with someone you don't really know.

Sarah 10/29/2009 1:20:59 PM
I am so hectic about public bathrooms esp. toilets on planes - I can do a 14 hour flight to Aus plus the hour before and the hour to then clear customs/passport control with out using the loo. I don't mind doing the bush thing, but dirty bathrooms just make me heave.

Lynne McIlrae 10/29/2009 1:22:54 PM
When visiting my niece who lives in Nashik, India, our lunch stop was always at MacDonalds (yes, in India!)and not for the chicken burgers (no beef eaten in India), but for the Western style loo!

Banana 10/29/2009 1:38:23 PM
I made a pit stop at a bus station in a remote village in China while backpacking...The toilets in china are well documented...or their lack of…
The loo basically consisted of a slab of concrete with already deposited turds in various state of age…
Each cubicle was divided only by bricks less than half a metre high – So I had to endure to men squatting on each side of me having a conversation about this and that…Why goto the loo you ask? I don’t even want to describe what I had eaten for lunch…
The phrase seven shades of sh!t was also revealed to me during that trip!

Angela 10/29/2009 1:42:34 PM
Public toilets are my pet hate. How grateful we should be for loos in shopping malls that flush. Yet so many "ladies" seemingly forget to flush them...and the amount of "ladies" who just don't even bother washing their hands is absolutely shocking.

Prishanti 10/29/2009 2:10:51 PM
@ Dirk. Totally agree. I wish our society would take the time to inform themselves and be careful not to make ignorant judgement on the practices of the East. There is merit in Eastern customs.

Kayla 10/29/2009 2:43:37 PM
The western-style toilets in India are very disgusting, though. I'd squat ten million times before I'd use the toilet in McDonalds.

Anna 10/29/2009 2:43:49 PM
@Angela. I must agree 100% with you. At our company there are those who don't wash and I want to heave - even some of our top management ladies so it's not just the uneducated or poor!! Shocking!

@Angela 10/29/2009 2:48:58 PM
Thanks for the heads up Oh and the same can be said for 'men' - Gareth

BL 10/29/2009 3:39:08 PM
The loo's in China take the cake. Clearly aiming is not a priority, and nothing gets flused! Used loo paper just gets thrown to the side.... just too disgusting.

Jay 10/29/2009 3:46:27 PM
The UK toilets and cities have become so disgusting lately because of all you South Africans flee'ing from your own country to live here in safety. Go home if you don't like it here oh yes I forgot, they don't want you there haha

Hennie 10/29/2009 5:12:48 PM
If you into wilderness hiking you carry a spade and a box of matches... There are no toilets on top of the Drakensberg but the views... eco-friendly ablutions are important to those you spend some time in nature, yet dont want to ruin it.

Suzy 10/29/2009 11:16:35 PM
I went to the loo in Mumbai international airport and had to leave because it was so horribly revolting, it looked like someone had literally exploded!! although i was there for a very short time, it is a stunning country but....

fu 10/29/2009 11:37:29 PM
@Deejay surely he was talking about the fools that ONLY use paper to merely pat themselves dry and don't use water to wash up for better hygiene?

marcus 10/30/2009 6:09:04 AM
Why they kept public toilets at filing stations locked? They were afraid somebody would go in and clean them. And no Jay, we're in the UK to raise the average IQ of both countries.. haha.

Pippa 10/30/2009 7:25:21 AM
I second the comment re Bali...not just the monkey forest, but the toilets at Tana Lot too! Despite being very careful, I got Bali Belly on our honeymoon, and let's jusy say that for those going there, you should consider packing your own loos rolls and Immodium instead of that 6th sarong!

anthony 10/30/2009 7:41:19 AM
a friend and his wife did a motorbike tour of india a few months ago and found no toilets at all; everyone dumps in any convenient place women take a whizz in every street bending over - the the stream shoots out about 3m behind them I assume my friend's wife also had to do the same. He was still in shock when we saw him, a week after his 6 week trip

JR 10/30/2009 8:04:34 AM
I find it a very nice article, and can associate myself very well with it. Dark Africa is no better; I spent 36 hours on Conakry (Guinea) International Airport (my Air France flight was cancelled and rescheduled – without Air France making any attempt to help (in fact refusing any help)) - without a toilet that could be used by a civilized person. When I finally could use the toilet in the departure lounge, I had to use my handkerchief as paper. Having said that, not all toilets on so-called first-world airports are great, I have experienced some sad-state toilets at Frankfort Airport. The ones at Charles de Gaul & Zurich (and Tel Aviv for that matter) are great. The problem with London is, that in fact, it is most probable because of the vast amount of non-British (e.g. Asian) people living there. If you stay in some of the smaller towns (with less or no foreigners), one will find the toilets very good. Personally I despise those toilets with the “shower” (to wash their but) mounted next to the toilet – because they are mostly not in a state useable by people looking for a clean and decent place to relieve themselves. And if any one feels the need to “shoot me down” for my statements, so be it. They are facts, not fiction, and not perceptions.

Handy 10/30/2009 10:20:57 AM
I am going to Oman and Dubai in December. Does anyone know whether I should take along toilet paper? Are their toilets clean?

Angela 10/30/2009 12:43:21 PM
@Anna - we have the same problem in my company too. Amazing how many women sneak out without washing their hands if you are in a cubicle. They obviously think that just because we can't see them, we don't know who they are! Well surprise...I know who they all are...filthy soap dodgers!!!

Blender 11/3/2009 12:36:28 PM
Try the pit toilets on Kilimanjaro, a visit to the lean-to on the precipice at Barafu Base Camp at -10C was memorable....

Malcolm 11/4/2009 1:13:26 PM
This brings back memories of a overnight stay in a cave at Drakensburg. We were a group of 30 and I clearly remember the group leader uttering the following words: If you need to go, please move the rock, pick up the pofadder and set it aside, now do your thing, When done, please pick up the pofadder, put it back where you found it, pick up the rock and put it back where you found it." - Classic - Suffice it to say I shut down all systems until were were back in a hotel.
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