'Oprah changed my life'
2004-09-28 09:24
Norman Silke
Bloemfontein - An Oprah Winfrey chat show changed Esme van Zijl's life forever.
For most of her life, Van Zijl - whose uncle allegedly raped and sodomised her for years while she was between the ages of six and 15 - hated herself.
She was addicted to drugs and alcohol until 1997, she was overweight and tried to hide her femininity by dressing and acting like a man.
"I led a dysfunctional and unproductive life. At one stage, I planned to kill myself and my partner," Van Zijl said.
Her salvation came from an unexpected source: Oprah Winfrey, who admitted on a chat show that she had also been molested as a child, but that she had managed to overcome it and do something with her life.
"After Oprah's admission, I realised that what had happened to me had not been my fault," Van Zijl said.
She decided to take her uncle to court. But the Cape High Court rejected the 52-year-old Van Zijl's claim that her uncle, Imker Hoogenhout, now 90, sodomised her 40 years ago.
The Prescription Act stipulates that a civil claim for damages can only be filed up to three years after victims of sexual abuse turn 21. If not, any civil claim lapses.
Her bitter fight in alienated her from her family, who never believed her.
After hearing Oprah, Van Zijl changed. These days she gives vent to her emotions by drawing building plans, painting and playing the piano. She has changed her "butch appearance" and has lost more than 30kg to date.
And then, on Monday, legal history was made when the Appeal Court in Bloemfontein gave Van Zijl the green light to continue a civil case against the uncle who allegedly molested her.
Van Zijl said she will now decide, along with the Women's Legal Centre that is handling her case, what to do next. Money is not the motivation, she said.
"I wanted to give a voice to other people and that has now been done, the circle is complete," Van Zijl said.
The Supreme court referred the case back to the Cape High Court where Van Zijl's claim will be heard.
- Die Burger