Ask sis Dolly: Stuck in a marriage of convenience

By Drum Digital
10 April 2015

I only chose to be with him because we were very poor at home and he has a good job.

I've been with my kid's father for 12 years and have a customary marriage. I only chose to be with him because we were very poor at home and he has a good job, but I'm not in love with him. he went away for a year and I met a guy when I was out with friends. I told him I'm married, but we still exchanged numbers. He's loving and caring and we love each other deeply and see each other every second weekend. we are soul mates. he wants to marry me, but worries about what I'll have to tell my parents and kids. I've never been this happy in my life and I don't want to lose him.

Sis Dolly answers:

Regardless of anyone's opinion about your reasons for marrying this man in the first place, I respect your honesty. My advice is to talk to your husband, family and children. It won't be pretty or pleasant and you'll lose some of their trust along the way. chances are that your husband knows why you married him- if not consciously, then in his heart- because we know when our love isn't returned. You've already made your choice and it won't be an easy ride. If you and your husband choose to be respectful in how you share time with your kids, they will be fine. It is the drama that always affects the children.

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