He wants another wife

By Drum Digital
13 January 2014

I’m having sleepless nights trying to figure out what to do.

In our culture, if a man asks his wife’s permission to take a second wife, and she says “no”, then he can’t marry the second woman.

The truth is, it’s up to you. You’re having to cope with so much here; not only has your husband cheated on you but he’s now brought home a new woman plus the children that he has fathered. You must be devastated and I feel for you.

You have to weigh up your options: if you leave him and this situation, where will you go? He’ll have to pay maintenance for you and your minor children but will you be able to survive financially? Talk to your children, especially the older ones, and ask them how they feel about what is going on.

Then I suggest you get legal advice as to your options and your rights. This will make it much easier for you to make a decision about your future. If you can’t bear the thought of sharing your husband, then you must be brave and leave him.

You deserve to be treated with respect and loyalty. It will be hard at first, but with the support of friends and family, you can pull through. This might be a chance for you to start living a more independent life again.

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