The truth about marriage

By Drum Digital
28 August 2014

Here are some things you'll be glad to learn and others you wish you'd known earlier about marriage.

Whether you're single, engaged or already married, there are a number of views on the union of marriage.

It's always great to get perspectives on marriage from different people and take from each one, ideas that resonate with you as an individual and as a couple.

Here are some things you'll be glad to learn and others you wish you'd known earlier about marriage:

Spirituality is a vital cornerstone

You’re going to need some direction, this is usually a great way to connect the two of you deeply.

Communication is essential

Always make a concerted effort to keep the lines of communication open - that means you have to listen as well as talk.

Ladies, beware of bombarding him with too much info

During conversations, remember that he may not be as engaging about certain gender-specific issues. This isn't necessarily because he doesn't care but may have more to do with how men have been socialised.

Trust is important and not only refers to cheating

Trust is ever-so-fragile and an all-important part of making marriage work. Can your partner trust you to stick it out when things are tough financially? Always work at strengthening the trust between the two of you.

You are going to have so much fun with each other

You have a lifetime partner to try new things with, travel with and enjoy the art of doing absolutely nothing with.

Your spouse will become your best friend

You will still have your boys and your girls to hang with but something about the closeness with your spouse will turn him/her into your best friend. There are things only you two will share with each other.

The relationship will change because you will change

This is more about maturity than anything else. You'll find that some of the things that bothered you about him in earlier years may either fall away or no longer be an issue for you. The older you get, the more you prioritise things that matter.

Some folks won’t be happy for you

This will have nothing to do with you and everything to do with their personal issues. There is nothing you can do about this, unfortunately, except keep a safe distance from the negativity.

Don’t tell everyone your business regarding your marriage

Going back to number 8, not everyone is happy for you and will look for anything to make you unhappy. Be careful who you tell and what you tell.

The sex is so much better

The added intimacy, strengthened trust and the freedom that comes with both means a more explosive sex life for both of you.

-BLACKANDMARRIEDWITHKIDS

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