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3 Important conversations to have before starting a family

By Faeza
17 May 2016

Becoming a parent can be the most important decision you ever make, and there are certain conversations you need to have with your partner before you take the leap into parenthood.

1. How will the child be cared for?

Many years ago it was common practice for mothers to stay at home to raise the children until they were fully grown. But, with women playing a larger role in the working world, this is becoming less and less expected. Many women don’t want to give up their career in order to have children and fathers are starting to play a more active role in the everyday duties of raising children.

However, some parents believe it’s better for the child if one of them remains home.

So, you have to talk to your partner about whether one of you will be a stay-at-home parent or you’ll both work. And if you both choose to work, who will care for the child? For example, will they have a nanny, or go to a crèche?

2. What values and beliefs will you instill in your child?

If you and your partner agree on religious beliefs, and will you raise your child to share in those beliefs? If you believe in different faiths, will you choose one or combine the two? It’s also important to consider the values you’d like to pass on to your child.  

If you and your partner have opposing views on certain important issues, how will it influence your child? You need to decide whether you want your little one to follow in your footsteps or make up their own mind about what is important.

3. Are you financially stable enough to raise a child?

Children are expensive. Food, education and other everyday necessities cost a large amount of money, and it increases as they grow up. You have to pay for everything from the day they’re born until they earn their own living.

Having a child is a huge financial commitment and you have to seriously think about whether you can afford to start a family now. Money isn’t something you want to have to discuss when you’re considering raising a family, but you need to be responsible and plan ahead.

These are just three of the things you need to discuss with your partner before you try to get pregnant or start researching adoption in South Africa.

Source: All4women