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6 Steps to build your self-confidence

By Faeza
11 April 2016

Have you ever stopped yourself from following your career passion, saying hello to that guy, opening your dream business or speaking up in the boardroom – all because of a lack of self-confidence? …

Looking back at my life and after coaching hundreds of women, I know that self-confidence is essential to our success and happiness.

The good news is that we can build our confidence. Here are 6 steps to greater self - confidence:

1. Believe in yourself

We need to believe in our worth and our abilities. Often confidence is confused with arrogance, but for me self-confidence is understanding that we are not perfect but we are good enough, and embracing who we are – faults and all.

About ten years ago I left a corporate career to find my dream career. I would never have been able to take that leap if I didn’t believe in myself and have the confidence to walk a different path. If you want to succeed, you need to believe that you are able to.

2. Adopt an amazing attitude

Confident people have a great attitude. They are positive and a pleasure to be around. Our attitude is influenced by many factors, but ultimately we can choose our attitude. We choose what and how to think.

3. Use your body

The quickest way to build our confidence is to use our body. Walk with an upright posture, maintain eye contact and smile. Our body posture affects what others think about us, and how we think about ourselves. A good posture sends positive signals to our brain, which reinforces our self-confidence.

4. Face your fears

I remember the first time I did the fire walk (walking over hot coals with a trained professional). I was so afraid, and waited until there were only a handful of people left before I gave it a go. When I reached the other side (burns free), it was the most euphoric feeling I ever had. I felt like I could do anything. Overcoming that fear allowed me to see myself differently and I felt empowered to do so much more.

5. Get support

Surround yourself with people who support and encourage you. Hanging around negative people, or people who are constantly criticizing you, will reduce your self-confidence.

There weren’t many people who supported me when I left my corporate career to go and ‘find myself’. It was lonely at times, and I questioned myself and what I was doing.

Luckily I had family and friends who were my cheerleaders. They didn’t necessarily understand what I was doing, but they supported me nonetheless. They believed in me, even when I didn’t believe in myself.

6. Plan and prepare for success

I have presented at numerous conferences: however I never take public speaking for granted. I practise my speech several times. I go to bed early the night before, and get up much earlier than necessary to give myself enough time to do one last practice session.

My preparation helps me to stay calm because I know that no matter what happens on the day, I did everything I could and the rest was out of my control