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HELP: "My fiance is a mama's boy"

By Faeza
12 September 2016

Anonymous from Umlazi writes: 

My fiànce’s mother interferes in our relationship. He’s paid lobola but he still puts her first. She asks things from my husband and he will do them without telling me. When

I ask him, he says its his money and he does not need my permission to do things for his mother. He says he won’t marry me legally unless she gives us

her blessings.

Sis Naledi responds:

Your man seems to be very attached to his mother. Their relationship will be a problem

for anyone who wants to marry him. Unfortunately it is not marriage that will sort out this problem but willingness on his side to manage his mother. Discuss this with your family

as they are now involved through lobola. Some boundaries need to be set between the mother and your marriage. If he does not show respect for you and is defensive then you are heading for a disaster.