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A Brief History of Christianity

20 April 2012, 13:26

Most of the arguments centered on religion on News24 focus on the creation myth versus evolutionary science. Those who choose the rational, logical theories of science want to tear their hair out explaining the facts to religidrones, while the Christians perch on their high horses, extolling the virtues of the invisible smiter on the cloud.

But have you ever wondered where all the doctrine came from?

Let’s go back in time a little, to consider the facts about Christianity.

In the beginning, there was religion. It was pagan, and it was earth centered.

Pagan religion was wide spread throughout the world, and in Europe (where the rewritten, reworked version of events known as the bible came from) that pagan belief was centered on three main deities – the maiden, the mother, and the crone.

Of course, later on, when religious leaders plagiarised preceding belief systems to create the bible, they chose to retain that holy trinity, to keep people happy. But because all organised religions are patriarchal in nature, they couldn’t have women at the helm. Oh no. They chose to morph the original trinity into the father, the son, and the holy spirit.

Early Christians stole plenty of other symbols from the pagans too – from the cross to the Christmas tree, to many of the religious holidays we still celebrate today.

They did invent hell though. But more of that later.

What’s interesting is that when the assorted lunatics who were munching on mushrooms were writing down their visions, the rest of the developed world laughed at them. The Romans thought they were just plain nuts at first, then they got miffed at the upstart Christians and their one god, but eventually, they realised what the modern day church still knows:

religion is the ultimate form of control.

So the savvy ancient Romans started to adopt the Christian faith as their own (there’s a reason the Vatican is in Rome today you know) and they used it to control people’s behaviour, and to score more tax (yes, tithing is a tax that religidrones will willingly pay in the interests of saving their immortal souls.)

It wasn’t enough to impose the rules of religion on them though, so hell was invented as a means of keeping everyone in line. Don’t follow our rules? Burn in hell.

The interesting thing is that the original rantings of the mad men have changed a lot over time. It’s well known that the King James Bible, the most popular version in the world, is based on incorrect translation of the original text.

Then there’s the Dead Sea Scrolls – which were conveniently left out of the final, edited version, along with other knowledge.

The church didn’t stop at editing though.

When early knights looted and pillaged, in places like the Library of Alexandra, what they didn’t burn or destroy in the way of knowledge was carried back to the Vatican, where it still lies today.

Some of the greatest early works of the greatest minds of all time were either destroyed or stolen by the church. And you thought it was only the modern church that was designed to keep people dumb?

I know all you religidrones are reading this, and doing what you always do. Burying your heads in the same (or somewhere closer to home) but it’s all out there. It’s in books. Because yes, believe it or not, there are books other than the bible that will teach you all sorts of things. All you need to do is open them.

The truth is, I couldn’t care less if you believe the religious myths out there. If you get something good from them, then good for you. If believing makes you a better person, then believe on.

Just don’t ever make the mistake of believing that the cobbled together stories, plagiarised from every other religion through history is the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth.

Relgious works are wonderful – taken in figurative context, as stories and even as guidelines. But to take them as fact reveals that you are a mental midget of the worst kind.

Science and religion need not be polar opposites. You can choose to believe that god was some sort of catalyst for the miracles of the big bang, evolution and all the rest of it. But only an utter idiot would discount the overwhelming and growing body of evidence that makes up science in favor of a religion that was stolen from another religion, that was borrowed from yet another, that was invented, originally, by our much less sophisticated ancestors to explain things that they lacked the science to explain.

Don’t let your religion be your excuse for ignorance, and we’ll get along fine.  

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