It’s Sunday afternoon and after a splendid afternoon on Durban beach sands, I quickly packed my bags and rushed through late traffic to the bus rank. I raced up the steps and the roaring sound of the bus engine deafened my ears and never had a slight opportunity to talk to the spectacled old man behind the steering wheel when two young men shifted, making seating space for me at the last available seat.
I sat there and the bus made a right and left turn and went through a toll gate and struggled on the hill heading to Pinetown where my friend was waiting for me on a long and tedious trip to Tshwane. The two gentlemen were chatting freely, believing that nobody in the bus understood their language, Pedi, a Northern Sotho language. I looked in a different direction but kept my ears high in the air and suddenly I decided to switch on my voice recorder as a witness and this is what my recorder gave me once I was relaxing in my room.
Their conversation; ‘This is time after May when Julius will be visiting Inkandla sitting with Jacob on a cow or goat skin sipping kaffir bier from a heavily decorated Ndebele colour coated calabash and a little while later one of Bra Jake’s wives brings Phuthu pap and full cream milk. This should not be a problem as you all know that there is a fashionable kraal there and we expect high grade milk production.
Later on, in a sweltering summer heat, they would be walking happily hand in hand with their protruding bellies leading them towards the swimming pool to cool off their rich, sweat stained bald foreheads that speaks a lot of their wealth. They then raise their faces in the direction of a youth running towards them to inform them of the visiting ANC and EFF youth leaders at the gate who came to ask for advice from them.
I promise you my friend; this will be a nice era when the old friends who became enemies overnight by mistake, but decided to be friends again and work together for the sake of their beautiful country and its loving people. Yes they can’t afford to be enemies forever because they depend on one another!! True, one made the other to be his President before their relationship went sour like milk produced at Inkandla.
They again raise their heads as another Bra Jakes’ wife brings a golden tray with long glasses, an expensive whisky and a pot of ice cubes. They then go for doubles and the liquid sparkles in their dark sunglasses as they say cheers to a happy new South Africa under Malema and Bra Jakes as his first advisor and you could hear the clicks of their gold lined glasses.
They had just returned from Zim for the state funeral and brought back along with them all the cows Julius received as a present from his mentor, Bob. They then decide to keep them in a fashionable kraal at Inkandla, yes, what, they are friends ‘mos’, remember? Towards the death of the day they are joined by Tony, Shabir, Jackie and many of Bra Jakes’ ageing friends and they go inside one of the beautiful huts, this is a relaxing point for Bra Jakes.
They sit on high stools on the counter facing Bra Jakes behind the counter. This is his private bar lined with all the expensive wines from Stellenbosch, top refined whisky from England and best brandy from France and Nederland, Holland. Bra Jakes extend his hand to a machine that plops and a ‘Letha mshini wam’ song goes on the Grundig surround sound system and they all get down to a dance floor except for Jackie who suggest that he need medical attention, then enters a number of men in uniform, overalls and put the staff on the neatly arranged tables. Then Julius jokingly asks them if the braai was from one of his cows. “Is it Zimbabwean import”? They then sink their teeth and their moustache explains this better.
Julius’s face is looking pale as he forgot to add tonic water in his first two shots. Tony asks him why he forgot because he was talking to him. Julius explains to him politely that the work of Presidency is too much for him “I also forget my EFF beret nowadays, but it doesn’t matter, I’m where I wanted to be. A President does not have to worry about cheap berets; there are Italian hand crafted suits I don’t have time to wear because of the beret”. An ambulance arrives and Jackie is whisked away and the party goes and Bra Jakes asks them to leave as he has recently added a brand new respecting Venda wife to his house.
Then again Julius misses the point as he asks Bra Jakes, “Does your vendor wife in the spaza shop sell tenders, I need one for Shibambo, my good boy”? Then tells him; “you see the effects of failure?, By the way, you also could not make it in simple Woodwork”. Then suddenly Nathi appears at the door with a bag full of handcuffs as he announces that he is going to lock them away. Their charge is that; they did not invite him and Thuli sees that as real grounds for gross corruption. They then took a unanimous decision that Union Building as from that minute is renamed; ‘KOPANO-ROLIHLAHLA’- talking about pulling a leaf of the tree of how Mandela managed to bring the nation together with no violence.
Welcome New South Africa!!
Doesn’t this sound wonderful? Is this not a good account of a country called Liberation born from the mother called Freedom and the father Emancipation and Democratic Society as their offsprings? This is what is on the minds of our people. I’m now convinced beyond all reasonable doubts that our people want peace. You’ll agree with me that fighting is temporary; it is one method of restoring order and peace in the end.
By; Modiba Kadi
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