PLEASE NOTE:

MyNews24 is a user-generated section of News24.com. The stories here come from users.

 
ZION
 
Comments: 15
Article views: 562
 
 
Latest Badges:



 
View all ZION's badges.
 

AFCON New laws of engagement

27 January 2013, 10:04
 NEW  LAWS  OF  ENGAGEMENT

      First of all, due to the excessive number of fouls or fowls on the field then that field must have a name-change to NAN**S  or Chicken-licken.

     An emergency medical unit must be placed on the field to medicate non-injuries and unbroken bones.

     Most of the players must pay a fine or locked up due to being in possession too long;  They can go smoke their grass after the game.

     Goals may not be scored before the final 6 minutes because goals are not scored during the preceding 84 minutes.

    Referees on the field must wear hard hats due to airborne ball attacks.

    Cry while the national anthem is sung, it makes you look like a patriot, have your hair cut funny and make a fool of yourself.

    Spit snot onto the grass knowingly that the opposition may fall onto it.

    If the ref says” Come here you slob then go up to him, stare him in the eye and say: “Sir, do I have a choice of red or yellow card.”

   Never listen to the TV commentators because they are noisy, biased, always wrong, and seldom right

   If the ball is kicked off the field then stand around while somebody else fetches it and argue that someone else kicked it off the field.

   Kick  the crap out of the ball-boy because the little runt was preventing the ball from coming out of the scrum.

   If you are off-sides and found wanting argue with the linesman and threaten him and accuse him of being a useless idiot and deserves to work in the kitchen. Ask him what was he smoking then stomp off the field

   If you score a goal then toyi-toyi until you are asked to please leave the field or you will be thrown off the field and reported to Fiefa’s president.  And if you get too much flak then say:  Please sirs, can I have my goal back?  Ask the referee if you may also have some red and yellow cards just in case.

     If something goes wrong then look for a fight and call the opposition and the referee losers.

    If a camera is aimed at you then smile benignly and give the owner an obscene finger sign and shout “joune  ook jou m**r”

Disclaimer: All articles and letters published on MyNews24 have been independently written by members of News24's community. The views of users published on News24 are therefore their own and do not necessarily represent the views of News24. News24 editors also reserve the right to edit or delete any and all comments received.
 

Read News24’s Comments Policy

24.com publishes all comments posted on articles provided that they adhere to our Comments Policy. Should you wish to report a comment for editorial review, please do so by clicking the 'Report Comment' button to the right of each comment.

Comment on this story
15 comments
Add your comment
Comment 0 characters remaining

Read more from our Users

Submitted by
Zama Moyo
Africa Must Stop Rising and Start...

My contention is that, unless two issues are acknowledged and attended to, we may find ourselves punting 2016 as Africa’s big year, then 2017, and so on. Read more...

5 comments 241 views
Submitted by
Gideon Joubert
Don't disarm my SAPS

Campaigning for the disarmament of citizens is a repellent pastime in itself, and is but a degree removed from demanding that the police themselves be disarmed as well.  Read more...

15 comments 171 views
Submitted by
MWF
Greed leading the blind

People of South Africa. I know we have our differences and we have a tainted past, but come on? Let’s not cripple our nation, just to prove a point to each other?  Read more...

1 comments 83 views
Submitted by
Tendani Siala
The Mystery of R700bn Corruption ...

Many people seemed quite happy to accept the R700bn figure at face value without any question. Read more...

9 comments 494 views
Submitted by
PeterTracey
Decisions, decisions

Some things are not as easy as they seem. Read more...

0 comments 304 views
Submitted by
James Matoma
Bafana is a national embarrassmen...

How can the minister of sports and recreation, Fikile Mbalula, claim that he was satisfied with Bafana Bafana’s performance? Read more...

21 comments 870 views

Jobs in Cape Town [change area]

Property [change area]

Travel - Look, Book, Go!

Kalahari.com - shop online today

Valentine’s Day gifts – 14 Feb!

Gifts to spoil him and her. While stocks last. Shop now!

Games on Sale!

Save up to 60% on selected games. While stocks last. Shop now!

Up to 30% off All Textbooks

Save up to 30% off an extensive range of prescribed textbooks for all major universities and FET colleges. Shop Now!

Save up to 40% on outdoor accessories!

Tents, sleeping, day packs and more. While stocks last. Shop now!

30% off fragrances

Get 30% off fragrances for him and her. While stocks last. Shop now!

OLX Free Classifieds [change area]

 

services

E-mail Alerts The latest headlines in your inbox

RSS feeds News delivered really simply.

Mobile News24 on your mobile or PDA

E-mail Newsletters You choose what you want

News24 on your iPhone Get News24 headlines on your iPhone.

SMS Alerts Get breaking news stories via SMS.

Blogs Your opinion on you, me and everyone.

Calais Website keywords automated by OpenCalais.

 
Interactive Advertising Bureau
 
© 2015 24.com. All rights reserved.
There are new stories on the homepage. Click here to see them.
 
English
Afrikaans
isiZulu

Hello 

Create Profile

Creating your profile will enable you to submit photos and stories to get published on News24.


Please provide a username for your profile page:

This username must be unique, cannot be edited and will be used in the URL to your profile page across the entire 24.com network.

Settings

Location Settings

News24 allows you to edit the display of certain components based on a location. If you wish to personalise the page based on your preferences, please select a location for each component and click "Submit" in order for the changes to take affect.




Facebook Sign-In

Hi News addict,

Join the News24 Community to be involved in breaking the news.

Log in with Facebook to comment and personalise news, weather and listings.