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Irukandji
 
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Africa’s fossilised colonialists

20 December 2011, 13:22

“Africa – the cradle of Homo sapiens. The origin of civilisation and mankind. The birthplace of the human species and of Obama’s father.”

 

I always get a kick out of it when Africa is linked with any of the above statements.

 

The “cradle of mankind” was normally used when referring to our origins on the Dark Continent. But now, due to political correctness, and because scientists and researchers think that we all come from the same maternal ancestor that lived in Africa 200,000 years ago, we refer to the continent as the “birthplace of the human species.”

 

This is probably because “birthplace of womankind” would have had the gender inequality activists up in arms. So, let’s settle for the “birthplace of the human species.” In South Africa this fits in nicely with our squatters; who live in “human settlements,” and we already have Tokyo Sexwale, the Human Settlement Minister. That makes it nice and neat. Sort of.

 

Now, as to the maternal ancestor we all share: It is a sobering (and scary) thought that someone such as Julius Malema, is in fact related to you; no matter how far removed. Or, that the late ET was in fact one of your uncles.  

 

The clues to our origins are sparse and thinly spread, but reading up on findings done by archaeologist and researchers, one can only stand in awe at the conclusions they reach from just a few fragments of fossilised bones.

 

You and I, ignorant peasants that we are, would never be able to put the pieces of the puzzle together. Let me give you an example.

 

One day Mrs. Leakey, wife of the famous archaeologist L. S. B. Leakey, while climbing the slopes of a gorge in Tanzania, discovered two fossilised teeth embedded in a rock. Now, you and I would immediately have thought that these teeth could only belong to a Twin-toothed rock-eater which roamed these parts of the gorge a couple of hundred years ago. Right? Wrong!

 

Scientists at the University of California did a Potassium Argon test on the teeth and found the following: They belonged to a man, he was 1,750,000 years old, and his name was Zinjanthropus. Wow! Who would have guessed? Old Zinjanthropus was a rock eater!

 

But now we come to the crux of the matter.

 

Modern humans took their first steps to colonise the world from a single region of sub-Saharan Africa, according to British scientists. For some reason people started moving out of Africa and spread out to colonise the world.

 

And then what did they do?

 

They came back to Africa and colonised us, as well! Their own family! How can we ever forgive them?

 

No wonder Julius wants colonialists to leave. Again.

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