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Bulls Behaving Badly

26 February 2014, 13:50

I watched an astonishing site on you-tube last week* – a Blue Bull downing an entire litre of brandy! I am not sure if he was a player, a coach or even a fan, but in many ways they are all the same thing up North.

The man slugs from this enormous bottle of spirits and has to stop half way through to catch his breath. He nearly vomits, but perseveres and finishes every last drop.

He then proceeds to ‘neknominate’ the Stormers and Sharks to top his act.

Like, Duh!

At the time I was enjoying a glass of Shiraz on a wine farm. The farm was in the Robertson valley and had a beautiful view of a dam and mountains. Birds were chirping and Mozart (or was it Beethoven?) was wafting out from the tasting room; very peaceful.

I don’t usually drink brandy, but if I must I prefer cognac, served in a brandy balloon and warmed over a low flame by the hired help.

I would never down it. The drink is sipped, usually with a cigar at the end of a meal.

It got me pondering as I reclined in that comfy chair . . . wondering about the crazy goings-on up North.

Mmmm [takes sip]. . . It seems it is true what they say:  the Cape grows it, Jo’burg sells it and Pretoria drinks it!

And this got me to thinking about other wonderful Cape exports. Like bobotie for example. And Malva tart and Cape Brandy pudding. What about schools? We invented schooling in the Cape but only exported it quite a while later (and just between us Capetonians, it shows).

We also invented roads and ox wagons to send any trouble-makers on their way. Theoretically biltong, potjie kos and braai-vleis were invented by ex-Captonians who had been expelled from the city, so we can claim that too. And don’t forget that Afrikaans was invented down South, so it seems that even a new language is not too much trouble for us. And Kreepy Krawly’s and open-heart surgery? Proudly brought to you by Cape Town!

Of course! What about rugby, cricket and soccer? Every single one of these sports was invented in the Cape.

Is there anything of worth that wasn’t invented in the Cape?

Such are the musings, reclining in a deck chair, quaffing wine in a valley and wondering, wondering, wondering . . . can we bottle and export ‘class’ to Pretoria? 

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