PLEASE NOTE:

MyNews24 is a user-generated section of News24.com. The stories here come from users.

 
Brolloks En Bittergal
 
Comments: 11
Article views: 902
 
 
Latest Badges:


 
View all Brolloks En Bittergal's badges.
 

Bullying and initiation

02 June 2014, 09:13

I see that bullying is currently again very topical after a child at some upper-class  Pietermaritzburg School complained of being bullied by the prefects.

This case also puts initiation under the spotlight.

Speaking for myself (and probably being a lone voice in conservative Afrikaner communities) I HATE initiation “ontgroening”. In my opinion it should be abolished and rooted out.

Not being a psychologist, I can imagine that this must be a fascinating subject.  I must disagree emphatically with those that say initiation helps fostering unity and pride in the structure or organisation that practise it. Their arguments regarding instilling discipline are even more hogwash. Whilst it is undeniably so that many people claim they have benefitted from initialisation rituals,  I have a different personality. (And I am also convinced I am not the only one on earth that is like that.)

I HATE any form of humiliation to build "team spirit."
I hated initiation in high school and in boarding school; I hated basic training in the army and I am sure I would have hated Kamp Staaldraad. I HATE being humiliated. 

I was bullied by prefects in boarding school and by corporals during basic training and junior leadership courses whilst in the army.

Am I a "softie" or gay? 

Gay I am most definitely not. I think I am not a "softie" either. I am not artistic, sadly, I think predominantly with my left brain. 

At school I was well-built and big and used to be a strong strong boy in std 5 and matric. I was the 100m and 400m hurdles champion and played rugby for the first team. I was not the dumbest in my class. I graduated at Unisa – not that that is an achievement any more. I am currently a professional person and in my fifties.

So what is wrong with me? I just don't like any rontf*kkery. I never did.
Finish and klaar.

The fact that I was strong and strong-willed counted against me in boarding school because I was seen as being "hansgat".

In the army it was even worse - my nickname was "NAFI" for a similar reason.

So, here is something that most people do not realise: Physically strong and strong-willed children are also bullied - sometimes more than others.

It is traditionally stated that: 

*The typical victim of bullying has an insecure personality;

*the typical victim of bullying has lower peer acceptance;

*the typical victim of bullying is "different" in some way;

*the typical victim of bullying is physically weak;

*the typical victim of bullying has overprotective parents.

All the above may sometimes be true but not always. My parents were never protective – I wish they were; I was never weak, yet I was bullied whenever I was a freshman.  

I do agree that in the army I had no peer acceptance but that is because the trusted recipe in the army is for a corporal to turn the peleton on the poor conscript that does not “co-operate” by punishing them for his sins. “Julle maatjie wil mos nie saamwerk nie!”.  My revenge was to make kopperaal punish them more. That destroyed any peer acceptance.

My point is that initiation is a very bad thing and that bullying during initiation is more complex than people think. I do not think you can stereotype victims either.

Bullying definitely is very wide-spread and some teachers even bully children emotionally, but that is a different subject.

I will be happy to see the end of all so-called traditions that encourages initiation. It is never innocent fun for the victim who does not like it.

Disclaimer: All articles and letters published on MyNews24 have been independently written by members of News24's community. The views of users published on News24 are therefore their own and do not necessarily represent the views of News24. News24 editors also reserve the right to edit or delete any and all comments received.
 

Read News24’s Comments Policy

24.com publishes all comments posted on articles provided that they adhere to our Comments Policy. Should you wish to report a comment for editorial review, please do so by clicking the 'Report Comment' button to the right of each comment.

Comment on this story
11 comments
Add your comment
Comment 0 characters remaining

Read more from our Users

Submitted by
Meta
News in the digital age

How do you think that spreading your hate/bigotry and or intolerance helps anybody? Read more...

11 comments 609 views
Submitted by
Brian Faul
How and why a Dictator is born

One needs to remember looking back in history these hard times is when a dictator is more likely to get born. It is during these hard times that a dictator gets voted into power. Read more...

5 comments 1353 views
Submitted by
Prenisha Naidoo
I will be proactive...

This letter is in response to articles on the death of baby Jamie Naidoo, We have the tendency to be reactive…we wait for something to happen, then suddenly we care, writes a News24 User. Read more...

2 comments 390 views
Submitted by
woadstress
Celebration

Make a list of at least ten things that you can celebrate, and write two or three reasons why you can celebrate those things or events. Read more...

1 comments 113 views
Submitted by
Eric de Castro
Last squeak of the year

 Read more...

10 comments 121 views
Submitted by
MarkH

Jobs in Cape Town [change area]

Property [change area]

HOUSES FOR SALE IN Paarl

Houses R 2 690 000

HOUSES FOR SALE IN Hermanus

Houses R 2 680 000

Travel - Look, Book, Go!

Kalahari.com - shop online today

2DAYS ONLY – 30% off Appliances

Coffee makers, blenders, fans, juicers and more. T&Cs apply. Shop now!

2 DAYS ONLY – 40% off books

Get 40% off when you buy 2 books. For two days only! T&Cs apply. Buy now!

Up to 50% off on outdoor gear

Save on chairs, blankets, cooler bags, umbrellas and more. Shop now!

Save on Samsung

Cameras, mobile phones, TVs, Tablets and more. While stocks last. Shop now!

Grand Theft Auto 5

Now available on PS4, Xbox One and PC from R649. Buy now!

OLX Free Classifieds [change area]

Samsung Galaxy s4

Mobile, Cell Phones in South Africa, Western Cape, Cape Town. Date October 24

Best bargain in big bay

Real Estate, Houses - Apartments for Sale in South Africa, Western Cape, Cape Town. Date October 25

VW Golf 6, 1.6 Trendline (Excellent condition)

Vehicles, Cars in South Africa, Western Cape, Cape Town. Date October 25

 

services

E-mail Alerts The latest headlines in your inbox

RSS feeds News delivered really simply.

Mobile News24 on your mobile or PDA

E-mail Newsletters You choose what you want

News24 on your iPhone Get News24 headlines on your iPhone.

SMS Alerts Get breaking news stories via SMS.

Blogs Your opinion on you, me and everyone.

Calais Website keywords automated by OpenCalais.

 
Interactive Advertising Bureau
 
© 2014 24.com. All rights reserved.
There are new stories on the homepage. Click here to see them.
 
English
Afrikaans
isiZulu

Hello 

Create Profile

Creating your profile will enable you to submit photos and stories to get published on News24.


Please provide a username for your profile page:

This username must be unique, cannot be edited and will be used in the URL to your profile page across the entire 24.com network.

Settings

Location Settings

News24 allows you to edit the display of certain components based on a location. If you wish to personalise the page based on your preferences, please select a location for each component and click "Submit" in order for the changes to take affect.








Facebook Sign-In

Hi News addict,

Join the News24 Community to be involved in breaking the news.

Log in with Facebook to comment and personalise news, weather and listings.