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Catering for the world

10 September 2012, 14:59

I’m not going to talk about the arrogant and rude ‘welcome’ I’ve received from people in South Africa, I’ll just say that I hope that the people on this website are not representative of all the people in this country, or I think I’ve made the biggest mistake of my life coming here... 

I’m not one to cuss and fuss so I won’t be spending time arguing with little children who make personal insults and mock my weight and even my neckline (I have a glandular disorder, by the way). 

On that note, I wish to make some more friendly observations with respect to your nation and culture. I’m currently based in what I understand to be the wealthiest city in South Africa, Gauteng, a strange sounding word and I can hardly pronounce it right. It is the guttural Ggg that gets me and I understand it is inherited from the German ancestry in South Africa? Although I see a number of American franchises out here, I have noticed that there aren’t too many American cars on your roads, except for our Fords of course. 

This past weekend, I decided to go in search of that steak I’ve been craving and went to a strip mall called Sandton City. Again I saw quite a few American brands and I can see what the mall designers were trying to do in emulating our big malls back home, and if Edna had been here she would have called it ‘cute’. But the place was still way too overcrowded for my liking. I sat down at a restaurant and ordered the biggest steak they had. Although the flavor was okay, I was still hungry when I asked for the check. And this is part of my problem here. 

Firstly, the whole experience started off wrong and I as the customer was left feeling anxious and confused. I fail to understand how a so-called developing third-world country is still clutching onto a handful of African languages that no-one outside of these borders will ever speak or desire to. And I am told that there are 11 of them! Go figure. 

Now while I respect your culture and history, I just think it’s pointless to keep holding onto something that’s dying and that will never be used again. Also, as a first-world tourist and visitor it is annoying to here people muttering away in front of you in a strange dialect. How do I know they are not talking about me? Stick to American please! 

My second problem is that I haven’t had the time yet to cash in my remaining US dollars and when I laid a few green backs down on the table, the rude waitress said they didn’t accept my currency. I’ve been all over the world and this is unheard of. My dollars are as good as gold everywhere, except here. To be honest, your animal-style notes are not that bad, but if I change 50 dollars into rands my wallet is suddenly bulging and over-full. Plus the last thing I want to do is to be walking around with bills that depreciate daily against the dollar. We heard back home that your currency even went into the trillions after Mugabe ruined everything.

If South Africa ever wants to be taken seriously by the global community, I’d suggest you change your attitude on several fronts. If you want more foreign currency invested here, you need to accommodate the people with the money and cater for the rest of the world and not just yourselves.

 Now I mean that respectfully and I hope you can receive it in the attitude that it’s meant. Good day.

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