Lucifer: It’sssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss that time agaiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnnnnnn!
(Sonic boom + laser-lightshow and heavy metal music)
Lucifer: Welcome, welcome everyone. It’s time for another epic episode of CHALLEEEENNNNGGEEEEE TO BELIEVERSSSSSSSS!
Contrarian: Good evening folks, Lucifer is right, it’s that time again and boy do we have a show lined up for you all tonight!
Lucifer: But before we give away anything… let’s take a look at the SCOREBORD!
THE SCORETALBE AFTER ROUND 1 STANDS AT!
COMMON SENSE 2 | FAITH 0
Lucifer: Ouch! It is not looking good for the believers.
Contrarian: That is correct Lucifer, the last episode saw… ZERO entries from believers demonstrating the awesome power of faith. For those of you that missed the show, you can get all the action right here http://www.news24.com/MyNews24/Challenge-to-Believers-2-20120420
We have an addition to our show and depending on it’s popularity tonight, we may make it a regular feature: it is called, QUOTATHON!
Lucifer: That’s right viewers! In our QUOTATHON feature, we will showcase one or two comments that were deserving of some more screentime! One quote will be from the believers, one quote will be from the atheists. Contrarian, please present the FSTDT quotes.
Contrarian: Our believer quote is from a person who calls themself JohnnyBGood – This leaves me so sad. @The Contrarian,(non-)believe what you want, but why make fun of believers? I believe and I dont care what you think of me. I know I dont need to justify, proof or otherwise explain my believes.
Our atheist quote is from Llewellyn – The Contrarian - Wish you would write more than 3 a week. I think there cannot be enough said about this topic. Go for it!
Contrarian: Aww thank you Llewellyn, and we promise to keep this and other programs running for your viewing enjoyment! Provided the broadcaster does not censor us!
Lucifer: And that wraps up our QUOTATHON slot. Hey Contrarian, you want to hear a joke?
Contrarian: Sure.
Lucifer: Why is the difference between Jesus and a portrait of Jesus?
Contrarian: No, I don’t know.
Lucifer: The portrait only takes one nail to hang! HAHAHAHAHA!
Contrarian: HAHAHAHAHA! You devil! HAHAHAHA, so true!
Lucifer: And remember folks, we are a ‘non-prophet’ organization so don’t sue us for defamatory remarks, we have no ‘donations’ flowing in like ‘other’ organizations.
Contrarian: After our last show, we received some letters of criticism that asking for proof and evidence from believers is simply a biased way to conduct these challenges to faith. As such, we have decided to alter tonight’s challenge a bit to only alienate HALF of the believers.
Lucifer: Yes unfortunately tonight’s challenge will not pit believers against atheist/scientists but against each other, at least that way they can win HALF a point! And with that said, it’s time to announce tonight’s CHALLENGE TO BELIEVERS! Contrarian, take it away!
Contrarian: Tonight’s CHALLENGE TO BELIEVERS IS……….… (drumroll)……… (cymbal clash)…., UNOBFUSCATE THE TRINITY!
Lucifer: The trinity has caused divisions amongst various christian denominations for centuries. There are those christians who bellieve that Jesus was god in the flesh and those who say he is the sun of god and an entity distinct from god almighty.
Contrarian: Jesus BLATANTLY said things on numerous occasions that points to the fact that he is a being distinct from god, and not god in human form. Before and after being crucified, Jesus prays to god to let this cup pass from his lips, and to forgive his persecutors because they know not what they do.
Furthermore, Jesus also said that neither the angels in heaven nor he (referring to himself) knows the day of his second coming. But he clearly states that God does and speaks of him as a separate entity.
There are various other cases where Jesus makes it plain as daylight that he is NOT GOD incarnate, such as when he claims to have observed the creation of the world, but was not the one doing the creating.
Lucifer: Judging by how deluded and robbed of rational thought believers are, I’m not surprised they fight over even this NON ISSUE. But this is not the time and place for my opinion, it’s time for YOU ALL, the true stars of this show, to MAKE A STIR in the comments box!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Believers and Atheists, MAKE YOURSELVES HEARD!!!!!!!!!!!
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