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Godless Heathen
 
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Dreams and Visions. Part 2

01 July 2014, 08:35
Last Night I had that dream vision thing going on again, I was on the dirt road and walking along with the hobo chatting, We were talking about the Church this atheist has to build. My first question as you recall had been why an Atheist? 

In our discussion last night we talked of many things, As I am wont I asked some tough questions, and got some answers. Now being a man with no religious influences all this seems crazy to me, but here are the questions and answers paraphrased.

I asked him who he was because It behooves me to know who is asking me to build a church. He answered, I am he, the one and only, the father of the universe. I asked him if he was nuts and he said no, He had been tested. I continued with another Question or six.
Me: OK, Mr Creator, Why does the Bible say you created the world in 6 days and Science says millions of years? 

God: I tried to explain to those folks back that creation was started with an idea, I planted a seed and nourished it, He couldn't understand the parable and made me seem more than I was. I nourished that seed for many years, tweaking it here and there till there was life, which I tweaked again and again and will continue tweaking till it all works harmoniously.
Me: Are you saying evolution is real?

God: Well that is what you call it, but I call it tweaking, I make small incremental changes to ensure survival of my creation.

Me: What about diseases, Why aren't you eliminating them?

God: That was a little bit of a mess, The smaller things are the faster they change, Tweaks I make don't always have the consequence I expect, I add a little something and it changes the way it works. 

Me: Why don't you just kill them?

God: It doesn't work that way, I want to know where they are going, In my original experiments, If I had killed them the human race would not exist. 

Me: What about the dinosaurs?

God: Gravity really botched that one, How was I to know that stars and stuff wouldn't stay where I put them?

Me: So you are the archetypal Mad Scientist? Ok let's get back to the Bible. What's the deal with Moses and all those commandments to serve you? Are you not just a little paranoid there, 3 out of 10 commandments about you?
God: Well actually I told that arrogant moron that we should get the word out that you shouldn't do stuff, that's going to make your neighbour want to kick the stuffing out of you, You know be kind, be good and make your neighbour like you. He went and made it 10 rules and skipped the really important message. Free will is a bugger. 
Me: What's the deal with slavery, rape and the other nasties of the time.  
God: I had no part in that, Humans just do stuff that I really don't approve of. 
Me: Noahs Ark? 
God: Really cool story, There was a flood in the area and only a few people survived it and tall tales were told, I had nothing to do with it.
Me: Jonah?
God: Are you going to ask about every tale in the book? I told you I had nothing to do with it, I don't micro manage, Even back then there were too many people to solve problems for.
Me: OK, Paul and Jesus?
God: If ever a story has been concocted that's the one. 
Me: Ok so if it's all nonsense, Why am I building a Church?
God: To tell people to stop being Richards, They need to start working together and stop killing in my name. 
Me: Is my message seriously, Love your neighbour? Do unto others as you would have them do unto you? 
God: Yes
Me: Prayer and worship?
God: I have always loved a good sing along, It warms the cockles you know? But I don't have time to answer prayers, There are too many people asking for a new car, for me to support their favourite team and other BS. Rather than spend the time on your knees, get up and solve someone else's problem.
Me: My Gran always said God helps those that help themselves, Is this right?
God: Not so much, but if you are doing something positive it makes me smile.
Me: Let's put this into a format we can understand shall we call them the Commandments?
God If you Like?
Me: 1. Love thy neighbour.2. Don't do anything that will harm your neighbour.3. Don't be a dickIs that enough?
God: Perfect.
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