PLEASE NOTE:

MyNews24 is a user-generated section of News24.com. The stories here come from users.

 
R.Phiri
 
Comments: 18
Article views: 2606
 
 
Latest Badges:



 
View all R.Phiri's badges.
 

Elephant in the room

22 November 2012, 08:16

Anchorman: In the news a somewhat p!ssed off elephant bull charged and overturned a vehicle in the Kruger National Park this week. The incident occurred on the S25 road between Berg-en-Dal and Crocodile Bridge. For more, we are now joined by the Elephant in the room.

Anchorman: MR p!ssed Elephant what triggered or aggravated you so much that you had to attack a vehicle with innocent passengers. Since communication officers at the Park, say they are not sure what triggered the charge, but that they suspect it may have something to do with a previous injury. Is this the case?

P!ssed Elephant: I wanted to run a mock on the government’s endless white elephant projects?

Anchorman: P!ssed off Elephant…what you basically saying is that you mistook the white vehicle in the park for a white elephant…Thus in a metaphorical manner you assumed that this was a white elephant project?

P!ssed Elephant: To some extent I wanted to blame it on apartheid, but black people have already took my pick up line. So I’ll stick with your excuse…it sounds sensible.

Anchorman: Park officials have stated that an incident like this is extremely rare. But recently we have seen Chickens worldwide refusing to cross the road. Reasons for their refusal are still murky at the moment. But animal activists say fowl play may have sparked this bizarre behaviour. An untalented comedian named Ronald Phiri, who wishes to remain anonymous, says this is no longer a joke. Why are animals suddenly starting to behave in an unorthodox manner?

P!ssed Elephant: But you humans have made provision for such behaviour in your constitution…look at how some of  the animals in parliament misbehave. Yet you place the spotlight on one rare incident in the Kruger National park.

Anchorman:  MR P!ssed off Elephant, are you aware that the driver of the vehicle sustained knee injuries while trying to escape?

P!ssed Elephant: This is nothing compared to the pain he’s going to feel when the E-Tolls are passed…start purchasing your KY jelly and brace yourselves for financial molestation.

Anchorman:  MR P!ssed off Elephant, your attack has nothing to do with the E-Toll and other issues you have mentioned. Why are you avoiding the fact that you were wrong?

P!ssed Elephant: Sorry for not answering your questions…I have a short term memory.

Anchorman:  Do you realize that you facing possible criminal charges…damage to property and assault?

P!ssed Elephant: My brothers Schabir Possum Shaik and Jackass Possum Selebi are card carrying members…so If I am prosecuted…I will just play possum and will be teeing off on the greens in no time. Do you fancy a game of golf MR Anchorman?

Anchorman:  Sadly the government has confiscated my golf clubs to give them to David Malatsi, a former politician and former Environmental Affairs MEC, who was found guilty of corruption relating to the controversial Roodefontein Golf Estate Development. He’s another Tiger Wood’s in the making.

Disclaimer: All articles and letters published on MyNews24 have been independently written by members of News24's community. The views of users published on News24 are therefore their own and do not necessarily represent the views of News24. News24 editors also reserve the right to edit or delete any and all comments received.
 

Read News24’s Comments Policy

24.com publishes all comments posted on articles provided that they adhere to our Comments Policy. Should you wish to report a comment for editorial review, please do so by clicking the 'Report Comment' button to the right of each comment.

Comment on this story
18 comments
Add your comment
Comment 0 characters remaining

Read more from our Users

Submitted by
JohnDough
Denied access to your children?

I understand that each and every divorce case is different, but the denial of access and withholding of maintenance are way too often used as weapons.  Read more...

6 comments 290 views
Submitted by
lizeka.maduna
Vagrants took to the streets

Scores of Vagrants took to the streets in Durban on Friday. Durban whoonga addicts paraded down West Street to the Durban City hall to hand over a memorandum to eThekwini mayor James Nxumalo.  Read more...

5 comments 348 views
Submitted by
John Madhiri
Freedom of expression

I get the idea that whilst we are free to express ourselves we should endeavour not to be offensive of to incite responses that lead to disharmony! Read more...

4 comments 118 views
Submitted by
Siyabonga Dube
My Father is no different to my M...

As we celebrate women’s month it’s inevitable to not acknowledge the fathers who are heading up households on their own all around our country. Read more...

3 comments 206 views
Mr Zuma has a way

There is still a way out for you Mr President Zuma then walk away (regardless of mistakes you made). Read more...

14 comments 743 views
Submitted by
Trevor McArthur
Defending the opposition

In defence of the opposition to speak freely in parliament without being threatened by the police. Read more...

4 comments 191 views

Jobs in Cape Town [change area]

Jobs in Western Cape region

Structural Technician

Cape Town
Communicate Cape Town Engineering
R180 000 - R300 000 Per Year

Information Security Auditor

Cape Town CBD
Mpumalanga Personnel & Training Consultants

Sales Consultant

Cape Town
C-Track
R16 500 - R27 500 Per Month

Property [change area]

Travel - Look, Book, Go!

Magical Massinga

Spend 5 nights at the gorgeous Massinga Beach Lodge in Mozambique and only pay for 4 from R13 220 per person sharing. Includes return flights, accommodation, transfers and romantic turndown. Book now!

Kalahari.com - shop online today

Up to 40% off fashion accessories

Save up to 40% on selected handbags, purses, watches, jewellery and more. Offer valid while stocks last. Shop now!

Save up to R2000 on top electronics

Get every day mind bowing savings on top electronics. Offer valid while stocks last. Shop now!

As seen on TV - New book releases at only R199 each

Get mind blowing book savings on new titles. Offer valid while stocks last. Shop now!

Save up to 50% on Women’s month treats!

Celebrate the awesome women in your life with awesome treats like beauty products, fashion accessories, bestselling books, electronics and more. Offer valid while stocks last. Shop now!

Up to 60% off - clearance sale!

Save up to 60% on appliances, books, electronics, toys, movies and more. Offer valid while stocks last. Shop now!

OLX Free Classifieds [change area]

Samsung Galaxy s4

Mobile, Cell Phones in South Africa, Western Cape, Cape Town. Date October 24

Best bargain in big bay

Real Estate, Houses - Apartments for Sale in South Africa, Western Cape, Cape Town. Date October 25

VW Golf 6, 1.6 Trendline (Excellent condition)

Vehicles, Cars in South Africa, Western Cape, Cape Town. Date October 25

 

services

E-mail Alerts The latest headlines in your inbox

RSS feeds News delivered really simply.

Mobile News24 on your mobile or PDA

E-mail Newsletters You choose what you want

News24 on your iPhone Get News24 headlines on your iPhone.

SMS Alerts Get breaking news stories via SMS.

Blogs Your opinion on you, me and everyone.

Calais Website keywords automated by OpenCalais.

 
Interactive Advertising Bureau
 
© 2014 24.com. All rights reserved.
There are new stories on the homepage. Click here to see them.
 
English
Afrikaans
isiZulu

Hello 

Create Profile

Creating your profile will enable you to submit photos and stories to get published on News24.


Please provide a username for your profile page:

This username must be unique, cannot be edited and will be used in the URL to your profile page across the entire 24.com network.

Settings

Location Settings

News24 allows you to edit the display of certain components based on a location. If you wish to personalise the page based on your preferences, please select a location for each component and click "Submit" in order for the changes to take affect.








Facebook Sign-In

Hi News addict,

Join the News24 Community to be involved in breaking the news.

Log in with Facebook to comment and personalise news, weather and listings.