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Elephants encourage fat people to vote

02 May 2014, 10:21
Inside every fat person is a thin one trying to get out. This is helpful in light of the expanding stats which show South Africa is increasingly obese. We are now third for obesity rates of any country in the world and first for developing countries. Soon we might be default head of BRICS by sheer weight. South Africa also has a huge percentage that hunger daily. Is there Hope ? Yes ! Even elephants get married.  As every well built person's head is a puppet and stomach a box -  we now have the world's most thriving puppet industry. Unfortunately belt sales are down as more people are wearing theirs on the inside. Does it matter if beauty is only skin deep. Who wants to see those layers of fat anyway ? The great thing is if opposites attract no elephants would vote for Zuma come voting day. Zuma may or may not be the heaviest post apartheid president to date, but he definitely ha a fat cash flow. Ask any elephant within 600 miles of Nkandla and they will tell you who to vote for. We might need some political liposuction to save this country. Every vote counts so use yours wisely. Use your brain and not your stomach to choose who to vote for. By the way if you have a sense of humor greater than your sense of smell, yet less than your belt size feel free to follow @safehumor on twitter. Never before has your country needed every ounce of you to drag itself to those booths and vote. Don't think of the journey back , just take it pole by pole.
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