If you’re like me – I’ve got no interest in Oscar’s piss stories – or the media’s feeding frenzy of his murder trial – here’s some comic relief:
A couple of years ago, I posted four articles on the subject of the Freedom Charter. The one you’re reading now was the first of the four. If you like, I shall post the others as well – just leave a note in the Comments section.
No doubt, with the coming elections, the ANC will use the empty promises of the Freedom Charter to persuade the mindless masses (MMS’s) to vote for them again.
Everyone should read the Freedom Charter at least once. And laugh at it at least twice. As jokes go, it features right up there with Malema’s red beret, Helen’s blue beret, Rumpeeelay’s saddle blanket, and the shower on Zuma’s head.
I don’t know if you’ve ever seen the Freedom Charter memorial in Kliptown. I have. It looks like a large roulette wheel made out of stone. The wheel is divided into ten wedge segments. Ten core principles – like the ten Plagues that Moses brought down from Mount Everest, are engraved on this stone – one in each of the segments.
Personally, I find the contents of the Charter much like that of Beasts of England – from Animal Farm, by George Orwell. With Orwell’s version much more plausible. I particularly like the following from Beasts of England:
“Riches more than mind can picture,
Wheat and barley, oats and hay,
Clover, beans, and mangel-wurzels,
Shall be ours upon that day.”
The Freedom Charter counters with:
“The national wealth of our country,
The heritage of South Africa,
Shall be restored to the people,
The mineral wealth beneath the soil,
The Banks and monopoly shall be transferred,
To the ownership of the people as a whole.”
I seriously doubt that the EFF will settle for clover, beans, and mangel-wurzels, when they can grab (nationalise) the mines, farms, and banks. But maybe that’s just me.
The Freedom Charter is characterised by its opening demand: The People Shall Govern! And it is right there, where it falls flat. For two reasons: The pee pull are incapable of governing; and those in government are too corrupt and incompetent to govern. Finish and klaar.
Let’s look at one set of demands from the Charter (my notes in brackets, in italics):
There Shall be Houses, Security and Comfort!
1. All people shall have the right to live where they choose, be decently housed, and bring up their families in comfort and security. (By all means: come erect your squatter’s shack in my neighbourhood. I’ll pay my rates and taxes, water, and electricity – you won’t have to pay a cent. I’ll patrol the neighbourhood at night with the Community Patrol Association (CPA), while you sleep in safety.)
2. Unused housing space to be made available to the people. (Like the thousands of residents who moved into Schubart Park in Pretoria; and were then evicted “for their own safety.”)
3. Rent and prices shall be lowered; food plentiful and no-one shall go hungry. (Need I elaborate on this nonsensical statement? Kill the farmers, disown their farms, give their farms to people who don’t know the difference between a shovel and a spade, and food shall be plentiful?)
4. A preventive health scheme shall be run by the state. (Like the 1.35 million defective condoms the ANC handed out at their party celebrations. AIDS activist Sello Mokhalipi, of the Treatment Action Campaign, said he complained after "we had people flocking in, coming to report that the condoms had burst while they were having sex.”)
5. Free medical care and hospitalisation shall be provided for all, with special care for mothers and children. (Free medical care? With babies dying because of poor hygiene in hospitals? With babies dying because health workers are on strike? With premature babies dying because of broken incubators?)
6. Slums shall be demolished, and new suburbs built where all have transport, roads, lighting, playing fields, crèches and social centres. (New suburbs will be built by people who cannot even build toilets WITH walls? Or maintain potholed roads. Or repair street lights after the cables have been stolen. Where social centres are nothing but SHEBEENS!)
7. The aged, the orphans, the disabled and the sick shall be cared for by the state. (Is that so? Now tell me this: Why are there so many frail, sick, blind, and disabled beggars on the streets; some of them are young children?)
8. Rest, leisure and recreation shall be the right of all. (It is obvious that this rule shall apply only to the so-called “leedas” of the ANC. Those for who rest, leisure, recreation, and corruption, have become a way of life.)
9. Fenced locations and ghettoes shall be abolished, and laws which break up families shall be repealed. (Yes, ghettoes shall be called “human settlements.” All fences shall be taken down and sold as scrap metal – along with electrical cables, water taps, gate motors, manhole covers, etc. Criminals shall not be sent to prison as this will break up their families. Ask Zuma, Malema, Shaik, Selebi, Cele, and hundreds of their comrades.)
Finally: There Shall be Houses, Security and Comfort!
OK. Now ask yourself: Who is going to pay for all of this? The unemployed millions of mindless masses?