PLEASE NOTE:

MyNews24 is a user-generated section of News24.com. The stories here come from users.

 
Irukandji
 
Comments: 21
Article views: 1114
 
 
Latest Badges:



 
View all Irukandji's badges.
 

Get rid of your TV. Now!

16 June 2014, 22:15

Almost four years ago, the wife and I decided that there was no place for TV in our blissfully happy, retired lives. So we gave away all three of our TV’s to charity. (No, not to Charity Khumalo, Sakkie. We gave the TV’s to real charity – a home for orphaned children.)

It turned out to be one of the wisest moves we’ve ever made.

No more feeling guilty because I’ve never had a TV licence; or listening to crappy commercials; or seeing bumbling BEE TV presenters trying to sound educated; or watching Showerhead, or one of his corrupt cronies, telling the pee pull just how much they care for the mindless masses (MMS’s) of this godforsaken country.

And I’ll let you in on a closely guarded secret: Watching TV causes, and spreads, colds and flu. We haven’t had a single cough, wheeze, or sniffle in our house for the past four years.

You want proof? OK, here it is:

Comes winter, you’ll see dozens of adverts on TV for medicines, pills, and remedies against the common cold. And what happens next? Within a few days after watching these commercials, viewers develop a cold, or get the flu. Ask yourself: what caused this? I’ll tell you:

Along with the TV-signal, the pharmaceutical manufacturers broadcast piggy-back injected, 185.64 MHz dB frequency, digitised versions of cold and flu viruses. When people watch these adverts, the digitised viruses enter the viewers’ bodies through their irises and move along their optical nerves – and, Voila! – they get sick. (This also explains why people don’t get sick in summer – when those commercials are not shown on TV.)

But, be that as it may, when I feel in the mood for some cheap entertainment, I read some of the world’s news, online.

One of my favourite sources of merriment and glee, is the *MailOnline. You have NO idea of how truly strange this world really is, until you’ve read these stories. (Yes, Sakkie, even stranger than the stories in “Die Huisgenoot.”)

But first, let me tell you: I only read the headlines to these stories. At my age, you don’t have time to read all the details – you might kick the bucket before reading it to the end.

Here are some of the stories:

1. Mila Kunis and Ashton Kutcher “to tie knot AFTER their baby is born”

Now, apart from the fact that I have NO idea who these people are, I’m sure that they are from another planet. Imagine using the old tie-the-knot-in-the-shlong-method as a contraceptive. It must be bloody painful!

2. Wim Hof Record Breaker Trains Others on His Mental Method

But, unfortunately, before I could read this story, I got sidetracked. By this advert:

Linsey Pelas. See her nude only on Playboy Plus. CLICK HERE.

So, being a dirty old fart, I clicked there. Alas and alack, all I got was:

R316.95 for 1 monthsR316.95 / Month R633.95 for 3 monthsR211.32 / Month R1,267.95 for 12 monthsR105.66 / MonthBilled in one payment of R1,267.95 R10.95 2 Day TrialR5.48 / Day

Ah, well, better luck next time.

3. Strange animals may have their own distinct nervous system

At last, something which made sense!

“Ctenophores really are amazing and Bolinopsis is one of my favourites. Like many other ctenophores, it has an elementary “brain” at one end, the arboreal organ. As far as we know it's used mostly to determine the orientation of the animal in the water column. The interesting thing with Bolinopsis is that you can chop this “brain” off – and it grows back in a couple of days! The animal kind of wobbles around brainless for a while, but once the organ grows back it's mostly capable of righting itself in the water.

In fact, Bolinopsis are really great at regenerating in general – cuts and tears in these animals heal in a matter of hours. There was even one Bolinopsis that had an entire comb row removed. The animal healed, and so did the comb row! The single row curled back on itself and formed a little ring of jelly with the cilia on the outside, which the students named a “ctenoblob.” The ctenoblob managed to swim around in circles for a day or so before starving to death, since it didn't have a mouth or a digestive system.”

Who needs a TV? I certainly don’t.

Maybe a psychiatrist, but a TV? Never!

*MailOnline  - http://www.dailymail.co.uk/home/index.html

Disclaimer: All articles and letters published on MyNews24 have been independently written by members of News24's community. The views of users published on News24 are therefore their own and do not necessarily represent the views of News24. News24 editors also reserve the right to edit or delete any and all comments received.
 

Read News24’s Comments Policy

24.com publishes all comments posted on articles provided that they adhere to our Comments Policy. Should you wish to report a comment for editorial review, please do so by clicking the 'Report Comment' button to the right of each comment.

Comment on this story
21 comments
Add your comment
Comment 0 characters remaining

Read more from our Users

Submitted by
Danie Strijdom
AIDS, Acronyms and Game Theory

Last night I attended an interesting event hosted by a society I belong to. Our speaker was a young virologist, Dr Britta Flach, who told us all about the HIV virus and how finding a vaccine for HIV has been a very tough road to navigate for scientists working in the field.  Read more...

2 comments 193 views
Submitted by
Wayne Russell
Consequences for misbehaviour

I attended primary and high school in the Eastern Cape. I remember receiving jacks from teachers and administrators until Grade 10. Not many smacks, but enough to recall a few. Read more...

10 comments 977 views
Dat Plane in Ukraine, Putin & a C...

As a last word... I crack myself up! Hysteria is the only option. Read more...

18 comments 416 views
Submitted by
Rools
Submitted by
Soka Mthembu
Submitted by
Lion87
A Letter to Danny Jordaan

The administration are so incompetent it makes the ANC seem like the excellence of the Swiss!  Read more...

17 comments 2237 views

Jobs in Cape Town [change area]

Property [change area]

HOUSES FOR SALE IN Paarl

Houses R 5 900 000

HOUSES FOR SALE IN Durbanville

Houses R 6 720 000

Travel - Look, Book, Go!

Magical Massinga

Spend 5 nights at the gorgeous Massinga Beach Lodge in Mozambique and only pay for 4 from R13 220 per person sharing. Includes return flights, accommodation, transfers and romantic turndown. Book now!

Kalahari.com - shop online today

Up to 60% off - clearance sale!

Save up to 60% on appliances, books, electronics, toys, movies and more. Offer valid while stocks last. Shop now!

Deal of the Week!

Get bestselling John Green novels now just R99 each! Hurry and get yours while stocks last. Shop here.

Mind blowing deals on beauty & fragrances

Save up to 30% off beauty and fragrances. Offer valid while stocks last. Shop now!

Up to 50% off hair care products!

Save up to 50% on professional hair care products at kalahari.com. Offer valid while stocks last. Shop now!

30% off academic books

Score a mind blowing 30% off academic books! Offer valid while stocks last. Shop now!

OLX Free Classifieds [change area]

Samsung Galaxy s4

Mobile, Cell Phones in South Africa, Western Cape, Cape Town. Date October 24

Best bargain in big bay

Real Estate, Houses - Apartments for Sale in South Africa, Western Cape, Cape Town. Date October 25

VW Golf 6, 1.6 Trendline (Excellent condition)

Vehicles, Cars in South Africa, Western Cape, Cape Town. Date October 25

 

services

E-mail Alerts The latest headlines in your inbox

RSS feeds News delivered really simply.

Mobile News24 on your mobile or PDA

E-mail Newsletters You choose what you want

News24 on your iPhone Get News24 headlines on your iPhone.

SMS Alerts Get breaking news stories via SMS.

Blogs Your opinion on you, me and everyone.

Calais Website keywords automated by OpenCalais.

 
Interactive Advertising Bureau
 
© 2014 24.com. All rights reserved.
There are new stories on the homepage. Click here to see them.
 
English
Afrikaans
isiZulu

Hello 

Create Profile

Creating your profile will enable you to submit photos and stories to get published on News24.


Please provide a username for your profile page:

This username must be unique, cannot be edited and will be used in the URL to your profile page across the entire 24.com network.

Settings

Location Settings

News24 allows you to edit the display of certain components based on a location. If you wish to personalise the page based on your preferences, please select a location for each component and click "Submit" in order for the changes to take affect.








Facebook Sign-In

Hi News addict,

Join the News24 Community to be involved in breaking the news.

Log in with Facebook to comment and personalise news, weather and listings.