Hey God, it is me, Merry. I hope you remember me, God – I spent about 50 or so years believing in you, and worshiping you. Ok, I wasn’t exactly a fundi, and I didn’t buy into all that “the earth is 6000 years old” bit, but You? You I did believe in.
In my 50 years with You God, I don’t think I asked for much. I never once asked you to find my car keys, or give me a parking space. I did ask you, every night, to keep us all safe, and I have to admit, God, you did do a pretty awesome job on that score. OK, you did let those young guys invade my sister’s house – but you didn’t let them rape her, so I suppose that counts as a win? It is now about five years since that attack, God, and she is still traumatised, but she is alive and she was not raped, and we are really grateful for that.
Of course, there was the issue of my Dad, God. He has been on my mind a lot, especially as it was Father’s Day this weekend. I didn’t ask you to save his life, God, that final time when he was so very ill, and in so much pain. I just asked You to do what You knew was best for him, so I am assuming that it was best for him that you took him, God. And although it really hurts to watch my mother, after 60 years of marriage, still coming to terms with her new life, I understand, God. I understand that You did what You knew to be best, and I am so very happy that my Dad, whom I love dearly, is no longer in pain. Of course I suppose You could have just taken him without letting him suffer those 24 hours of excruciating pain, You could have just let him go to sleep and not wake up, but I trusted that You knew best, and I presumed there was some reason for his final day of suffering. Perhaps the doctors needed further training on his illness or something – I was sure You must have had a reason.
Now I know I have moved away from you of late, God. I have quite honestly had some difficulty reconciling my view of you with that grumpy God of the OT, so I figured that if You are there at all, you cannot be the OT god. But be that as it may, here I am, God, it is me, Merry, and I am back again. And this time, God, I AM asking for something…
God, you know my guy Andy. I know You know him, God, cause he sure knows You. And I know he probably won’t ask you for himself, (although his Mum probably will, but then she is Catholic and given all that is said about the Catholics, who knows if You hear them, God), so I am asking, God. This time I am asking…
You, God, have let him contract this bloody awful disease. You did that, God. We know this, because we are told that You control everything. Now please, God, please – undo it. Not for me, God, I can understand You ignoring me as I have ignored You of late, and not because a little boy loves and needs him, or because his Mum, who has worshipped you for over 80 years, needs him… No, God, not for any of those reasons, brilliant though they are. Undo it, God, because You can.
I will try to understand God, if you want to make us all suffer a bit while he goes through the treatment. I get that we have all committed sins, and for that we should, in your book, be punished. And I guess if we are talking about doing things by your book, I would rather be punished here than when I die… I think.
But this isn’t about me, God….
This is about a man, a good man, a man who has been faithful to You all his life, who has done his very best to keep to Your commandments, and despite him doing his very best to live a good life, God, You have seen fit to visit this damn disease upon him.
We are told we should not question Your ways, God, but hey, you know what? I am seriously ticked off right now, so to hell with that – I AM questioning, God. I am questioning YOU. Tell me why, God. What has this man done to deserve this? What heinous crime has he committed in your eyes? It must be a very secret sin, God, cause I sure have not seen it. Did he have an adulterous thought? Did he wear two different types of thread? Was it the prawn curry that did it? Why, God, why?
So, God, bottom line here…
I am asking as politely as I can, God. Heck, if you want me to I will even grovel, go down on bended knee and all (even though we both know I have issues with my knees), hell’s teeth, God, I will beg if you so desire…
UNDO IT, GOD. They tell me You have said that with You, all things are possible. Show me. Show me that what they say is true, that You are the Almighty, All Powerful, All Knowing, that You, and You alone, are able to reverse that which You have done.
I know we are not supposed to make deals with You God, but I tell you what – you undo this right this minute, God, and I will not rest until I have persuaded every atheist on this forum of Your greatness.
UNDO IT, GOD – for the love of all that is good, undo it.