I heard someone say the other day when you have children your life is over. I burst out laughing. Then you might as well state when you get married your life is over or when you start working your life is over. Life is only over when you allow it to be.
I love motherhood and it is one of the best things that ever could have happened to me but I’m also still a woman. I’m still me. So I consciously made a choice to never lose my identity and be defined as one thing. No one is only one thing. We have so many aspects to who we are. We are a child, a parent, a lover, a sister or brother. So why when you become a parent be defined to that alone.
I almost fell into the trap of becoming one of those women whose closet consist of mainly sweats and t-shirts. Who watches television every Saturday night, snacking away out of boredom. Who would need to hire a SWAT team to locate her make-up. Then I made a conscious decision one day to say ‘NO’ this is not who I am.
So, after doing an extensive background check that would make Sherlock Holmes look inadequate I found a babysitter the kids adore and I trust completely. This allows me to go out with friends in the evening at least twice a month and paint the town red. Well we paint it blue, green, yellow, whatever colour is desired and more importantly I get to spend time with my friends.
So to those scared that their lives will change when they have kids. Damn right it will. Your life will never be the same again but it is an amazing change and does not need to take away from who you are as an individual. Never lose your identity. Not in a marriage or in parenthood. Keep a balance and always stay true to yourself.
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