PLEASE NOTE:

MyNews24 is a user-generated section of News24.com. The stories here come from users.

 
stuzaza
 
Comments: 7
Article views: 644
 
 
Latest Badges:

 
View all stuzaza's badges.
 

Horny Panda

07 July 2014, 19:25
As is often the case with great ideas, the bolt that hit me today came way out of left-field. I maintain the mind is most receptive when pleasantly distracted or somewhat in neutral.

The idea concerns China's seemingly insatiable need for Rhino horn and Africa's need for sustainable protein to feed its masses. Given China's booming population it seems strange that they would need the obviously highly efficacious afrodisiac (sic) in the first place.  However its not for me to judge a culture.

China has long been a hotbed of culinary diversity and coupled with the great gastronomic strides the Mother continent has made over the past few millennia i feel that my idea is of significant importance.

Simply put, China wants horn and Africa needs meat. Further, Africa has a long standing dietary love for rats, cane rats in KZN and "grass-cutter" in west Africa scuttle to mind. Given that, for all in tents and porpoises, the Panda is obviously a giant rat - what i propose is possibly the greatest trade partnership these two great peoples have ever embarked upon.

We Africans should invite another high powered delegation of Chinese to our shores, i am sure they know their way by now, and offer them limitless supplies of horn in exchange for a steady supply of those bamboo destroying murine critters they call a national pride. 

Further in keeping with accepted principles of entente cordial we should initiate customs and rituals to reinforce the sacredness of this Afro-Sino pact by making a great show of shoving said horns firmly up the jacksies of this delegation. The symbolism of this fundamentally fulfilling process should not escape the Chinese, wu i am sure will have tears in their eyes at this gesture, given the scale of our largesse.

I would hope this action will touch hearts and open up a flood of quality Panda meat for our people. The win-win rider to this decree would be the lifting of pressure on the endangered bamboo forests. 

I envisage a day when Panda will be served along side other great African dishes like Smileys, Gatsbys and Curry Bunnies. My personal feeling is Panda would be best served cold, as per the Sicilian method.

Disclaimer: All articles and letters published on MyNews24 have been independently written by members of News24's community. The views of users published on News24 are therefore their own and do not necessarily represent the views of News24. News24 editors also reserve the right to edit or delete any and all comments received.
 

Read News24’s Comments Policy

24.com publishes all comments posted on articles provided that they adhere to our Comments Policy. Should you wish to report a comment for editorial review, please do so by clicking the 'Report Comment' button to the right of each comment.

Comment on this story
7 comments
Add your comment
Comment 0 characters remaining

Read more from our Users

Submitted by
Hennie Potgieter
Are we losing our ability to reas...

Why is it that we can get so hyped about things that do not directly concern us, or that we do not understand? Read more...

0 comments 0 views
Submitted by
Johnny McIntyre
Sticking your head in the dagga

The war on drugs has been raging on for a few decades to no avail. Drug use, especially cannabis, is at an all time high and continuing to grow as increased enforcement efforts seem to have no effect.  Read more...

15 comments 1553 views
Submitted by
Legens Monspubis
Religion should remain in all sch...

Children should be exposed to all religions , both current and past. It should be taught to them on an even basis and particular emphasis should be placed on its history.  Read more...

119 comments 896 views
Submitted by
Percy_Makholwa
Mazrui and the South African serv...

As much as Ali Mazrui saw in West Africa, the problem of western appetites without complementing and satiating western technologies, the same comparison could easily be made in urban SA. Read more...

3 comments 130 views
Submitted by
Noli Zwe Hlope
Poor Reeva, not given enough just...

I have to say that, in this country the biggest criminals always get away with the crimes that they do.  Read more...

5 comments 510 views
Submitted by
SharksterII
Correcting Theists on alternative...

After we investigated the conduct of one of the more famous individuals based on his sexual conduct in my last article, I thought we can address some of the more commonly used arguments. Read more...

153 comments 886 views

Jobs in Cape Town [change area]

Property [change area]

Travel - Look, Book, Go!

Magical Massinga

Spend 5 nights at the gorgeous Massinga Beach Lodge in Mozambique and only pay for 4 from R13 220 per person sharing. Includes return flights, accommodation, transfers and romantic turndown. Book now!

Kalahari.com - shop online today

Save up to R1000 on Hisense smartphones!

View the large range of Hisense smartphones. Buy today and save up to R1000!

Deal of the week!

Save R1200 on the Samsung 48” smart full HD LED television now only R8799. Buy now!

Toys 4 for the price of 3

Buy 4 toys and get the cheapest FREE! Offer valid while stocks last. Shop now!

Mind blowing prices – As seen on TV

Get mind blowing prices on 1000’s of products! Shop now.

Save 20% on Nivea beauty products!

Buy any two Nivea beauty products and save 20%. Offer valid while stocks last. Shop now!

OLX Free Classifieds [change area]

Samsung Galaxy s4

Mobile, Cell Phones in South Africa, Western Cape, Cape Town. Date October 24

Best bargain in big bay

Real Estate, Houses - Apartments for Sale in South Africa, Western Cape, Cape Town. Date October 25

VW Golf 6, 1.6 Trendline (Excellent condition)

Vehicles, Cars in South Africa, Western Cape, Cape Town. Date October 25

 

services

E-mail Alerts The latest headlines in your inbox

RSS feeds News delivered really simply.

Mobile News24 on your mobile or PDA

E-mail Newsletters You choose what you want

News24 on your iPhone Get News24 headlines on your iPhone.

SMS Alerts Get breaking news stories via SMS.

Blogs Your opinion on you, me and everyone.

Calais Website keywords automated by OpenCalais.

 
Interactive Advertising Bureau
 
© 2014 24.com. All rights reserved.
There are new stories on the homepage. Click here to see them.
 
English
Afrikaans
isiZulu

Hello 

Create Profile

Creating your profile will enable you to submit photos and stories to get published on News24.


Please provide a username for your profile page:

This username must be unique, cannot be edited and will be used in the URL to your profile page across the entire 24.com network.

Settings

Location Settings

News24 allows you to edit the display of certain components based on a location. If you wish to personalise the page based on your preferences, please select a location for each component and click "Submit" in order for the changes to take affect.








Facebook Sign-In

Hi News addict,

Join the News24 Community to be involved in breaking the news.

Log in with Facebook to comment and personalise news, weather and listings.