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How much is that doggy in the window?

28 December 2012, 08:26
As South Africans we have learned of late (from a well connected source) that it is not a very "African" thing to spend time and money on dogs. The way to go is apparently to steer away from pets and start taking your neighbour for "walks" instead. The consequences of this new "way" will  need further investigation because I have a feeling it might lead to all kinds of polygamous behaviour which is frowned upon by the silly lawmakers (especially the Europeans) and their kind.

I must say I have always had a soft spot for "man's best friend" and have been known to fork out a couple of rands when my pet of choice looks at me with miserable & sick eyes. This was all in the name of friendship, humanity and mercy and I must also plead guilty to even allowing a mercy killing or two in this regard (not without many tears in my pillow and guilty feelings in my nightmares).

Under the new "dispensation" I will however be able to save on these dogged expenses and heartache and really be able to "love my neighbour". What worries me is that once I start spreading this love around I might end up with more wives and family than I will be able to accommodate in my lowly abode. I guess one will have to start building a bigger house for yourself then (I really feel sorry for all the other guys who doesn't have houses at this stage) because a man needs to take care of his own first- charity begins at home and all (and if they don't have food let them eat cake as the well known African saying goes)(apologies to MA).

Somehow I can't help feeling a  niggle in the deep recesses of my European brain that I might at this stage actually be spending even more on "myself" than when I was buying Dogmor for my loyal furry companion. The other funny thing is that the biggest complaints I've ever had about my dog was that he barks when he thinks my house is being threatened and that he has been known to drop a bomb on a neighbours freshly mowed lawn just to show his appreciation for the efforts. On the contrary we know how terribly complex things can get when your neighbour should get the idea that your neighbourly attentions might be "meer oor die hondjie as oor die halsbandjie".

To conclude I couldn't help thinking about the nice little tune:
How much is that doggie in the window (arf, arf)
The one with the waggley tail
How much is that doggie in the window (arf, arf)
I do hope that doggie's for sale...

Go google the lyrics to the tune, look at all the political undertones and I'm sure you'll come to the same conclusion - the speech writer was humming it whilst coming up with the words of wisdom.


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