Your relationship with a special guy has come and gone, but now you want him back.
Here's how to turn that ex-boyfriend into your significant other once again! Follow these steps to help you out.
They might not just let you win him back but make him love you even more then the last time you were together!
Consider why it is you two broke up in the first place. Do you just want him back just because you can't accept the idea that he does not want you? Or maybe you just like the idea of having a boyfriend? Or you really do like him?
Were you one (or both) of you abusive, controlling, mean, or possessive? Did one (or both) cheat? If any of these things happened, you'll want to think long and hard about going back to that kind of relationship, but if you do still want him back, try the following steps.
Be the person he fell in love with. He was attracted to you because he felt good with you, and you were fulfilling his emotional needs.
How have you changed? Correct bad habits and mistakes, if any. Be positive around him. Laugh and smile. Always stay positive to feel good about yourself and make friends around you feel good because of you.
Prepare your first words. The first thing that you say to your ex boyfriend is extremely important. If you say the wrong words, you will lose the chance to get your ex boyfriend back.
Do not react to his request for a breakup by crying and begging him to come back. This will not work. You are just going to make him feel more irritated with you and drive him further away. You need to understand that even though he initiates the breakup, there is a good chance that he still harbors good feelings for you.
Use the past to your advantage. If he complimented a particular outfit, wear it again. Or, share a lighthearted memory with him. If you have a chance to meet him, do it in a familiar place you used to enjoy good times together.
Listen carefully to his choice of words. He may say something unusual. If he ever uses an unusual or uncommon word, use it also in your conversations. This subconsciously tells him that he and you have a common way of talking.
Find out if your ex still cares. Before you start doing anything to try and win him back, you need to know for sure that he still cares. If he not, and you are still desperate to get him back, then you need to think of the subtlest ways to get him start to care again, even just a little.
Knowing that your ex still cares about you is the most important sign that things can still be mended. You should not start on anything before you are sure that your ex still has some amount of concern when it comes to you.
Casually ask if he'd like to do something non-committal, like having a drink with friends, playing miniature golf, playing tennis, etc. Something friends or first dates can do. And whatever it is, keep it fun. Leave out the serious talks for the time being. You'll have plenty of time to talk about that later. That is very intimidating to a lot of guys. However, if he initiates it, follow his lead. But don't go heavy.
Let him know you have been thinking about him. Remind him of that one time the two of you went to dinner at that great new restaurant and had a fabulous time? Leave him a short email telling him you ate there recently and thought of him. And, by the way, ask how he is doing. This is a non-threatening way to have a light conversation, which would not make him uncomfortable.
Invite him to talk to you. Express regret that things didn't work out between the two of you. Ask him if you can talk about it now that you have some perspective.
Pay some attention to your appearance if you have been neglecting yourself in that department. Get your nails and hair done. Take a nice warm bubble bath, and pick out a nice outfit.
Stop caring about how people perceive you. The fact is, it really doesn't matter. It's impossible to be yourself when you're caught up in wondering "Do they think I'm funny? Does she think I'm fat? Do they think I'm stupid?" To be yourself, you've got to let go of these concerns and just let your behavior flow, with only your consideration of others as a filter --—not their consideration of you.
If you just broke up (less than a couple of weeks) completely ignore him. He will call you if he still likes you. If he doesn't, then nothing you say or do will change that. (This works unless you are dealing with a guy who thinks that if you don't care enough to try to save the relationship. Sometimes, ignoring him makes him feel that you are perfectly fine without him and are moving on, which is the exact opposite of what you want when you are trying to get back with your man. Be sure you know exactly what type of guy you are dealing with when trying to get him back.)
Remember, no situation is hopeless. Every day, couples get back together regardless of the situation.
Find other things to focus on. If you focus your attention on a new activity, you will have less time to miss your ex-boyfriend. You will feel stronger and more in control of your life.
If you are still in contact, your ex boyfriend will notice that you have "moved on" and hopefully will start having second thoughts.
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