PLEASE NOTE:

MyNews24 is a user-generated section of News24.com. The stories here come from users.

 
Rammsteen
 
Comments: 1
Article views: 432
 
 
Latest Badges:


 
View all Rammsteen's badges.
 

I can be a governmental advisor

02 August 2012, 10:57

One Saturday in June last year, I decided to mow the lawn. It was partly due to the unhealthy length of the grass and partly because of all the leaves which had gathered on it from the cold front winds. I start mowing (yeah, with my electric 2500W machine, in your face Eksdom!) when suddenly the bucket is full. Now what? I have no bakkie to take it to the dump, I have no trailer, I have no more spare dog food bags to store it in, so I just chuck it at the back of the house – will deal with it later.

Summer came and went without me bothering about the growing pyramid of half grass, half compost behind the house. One day my wife asks me what I plan to do with “those plants” growing over the house. Obviously I reply that they are there for the shade when the next summer arrives, and they are trees – not plants. “No”, she says, “Those bright green stems with the white flowers and huge seed pods”. Flabbergasted I scramble around the house to be greeted by a few dozen ominous looking “malpit” weeds.

I call in the help of my trusted weed killer formula: diesel, and start drowning those buggers until the neighbour complains of his neighbour’s bakkie fumes. The next weekend I was glad to see all the vermin had deceased.

I decide to rent a trailer three weeks after that to haul away the stinking diesel / grass mountain to the dump. (Just think the points to score with the wife!) When I round the corner to start the load, millions of little malpit weeds anxiously await my approval of their brilliance at overcoming the diesel and migrating to the rest of the garden.

I ask around and get help, at the stop street. The moment I stop I am swamped with paint roller wielding hopefuls exclaiming that they have qualifications to fix the roof as well. Against my better knowledge I permit the most open faced one to grace the co-driver position. He tells me he is from Toti, has matric and picked up muscle, working at various building sites. I tell him that this is just a garden job at which he seems disgusted.

Getting home the boy eyes the rolling fields of malpitte and exclaims his knowledge of all other hallucinants, how to use them and that we can make money. I suddenly get this premonition of a young Zulu warrior standing over me with an assegai and wished I rather did this on my own, but common sense gets the better of me and I explain that the seed pods have to go into the bags whole.

Toti finishes up in no time. I let him go half day with full pay. I’m happy, wife’s happy, Toti’s happy. Good deal all round.

Rain hits a few weeks later and the garden flourishes. I get home from work the Thursday only to walk into a wife with a 10 bar lip problem. After doing some soul searching I assume it can only be another attention deficit bout from my side or the anniversary – no, that’s in December… She grabs me by the hand as if we were wandering through the Garden of Eden, alas – billions of little malpitte saw the light of day, lying dormant, awaiting the rain. I guess Toti saw the light of work for another day.

This is now my current project – ridding the garden of a ca-zillion weed plants. The project would probably run to the end of this year, no need to guess how much points I scored.

Now, as I rip the buggers out one-by-one, I discuss my failed stint with the other me, and realise how much of a parallel predicament our country is in regarding power, clean water, sewerage operations, general municipal service deliveries, road maintenance, government works, departments etc.

My advice to them is to do a bit of planning. That’s all, get some know-hows and pay the R400.00 per hour. It will be worth millions to us plebs paying for their Mercs.

Rammsteen

Disclaimer: All articles and letters published on MyNews24 have been independently written by members of News24's community. The views of users published on News24 are therefore their own and do not necessarily represent the views of News24. News24 editors also reserve the right to edit or delete any and all comments received.
 

Read News24’s Comments Policy

24.com publishes all comments posted on articles provided that they adhere to our Comments Policy. Should you wish to report a comment for editorial review, please do so by clicking the 'Report Comment' button to the right of each comment.

Comment on this story
1 comment
Add your comment
Comment 0 characters remaining

Read more from our Users

Submitted by
Kalibanache
South African Genie and the Magic...

The ANC thought that they had the magic lamp when Mandela was leading. And I think they were right... But where is his lamp? Read more...

3 comments 146 views
Submitted by
Kalibanache
A spot of Blemish and Dirty Bum.....

Maybe the 2 week break will help some people with the reality of matters. " I called out, Reeva, Reeva !" sob sob... Ja buddy, That's not what Gerry says..  Read more...

1 comments 86 views
Submitted by
Kruger
For whom the bell tolls

While speculation is rife of the ANC's impending fall and Jacob Zuma's time that is running out, the party - and it faithful - are gathering in a laager. Read more...

5 comments 987 views
Submitted by
Wouter Willemse
The Game has changed

If you are a child from the 60's, 70's or 80's in South Africa you had a different set of rules than the NewFreeBorns. Read more...

0 comments 93 views
Submitted by
Makate Rapulana
The SABC ís the voice of governme...

The public broadcaster is unapologetically the mouthpiece of any sitting government, and the opposition should reconcile itself with the fact. Read more...

8 comments 86 views
Submitted by
Makate Rapulana
ANCYL, Cosas, and the ‘nosey’ pub...

The public protector; blessed or cursed with a big and ugly nose was able to pick up a rather rancid odour emanating from a feeding trough; with Zuma and his lieutenants munching away the spoils of corruption.  Read more...

3 comments 65 views

Jobs in Cape Town [change area]

Property [change area]

Travel - Look, Book, Go!

Escape winter, head to Mauritius

Escape winter by spending 7 nights in Mauritius' tropical bliss from R13 215 per person sharing. Includes return flights, airport transfers and accommodation. Book now!

Kalahari.com - shop online today

Get many eggs in one basket!

Gaming bundles: 2 Super Hits games for R99, 3 Disney games for R99 and more + exclusive accessory bundles only available on kalahari.com. While stocks last. Shop now!

25% off bestselling books!

The Real Meal Revolution by Tim Noakes, Jeffrey Archer’s Be Careful What You Wish for, Man’s Search for Meaning by Victor E. Frank and many more titles. Shop now!

Up to 25% off electronics

Buy top electronics and save up to 25%. Such as kalahari.com’s 1# selling product the gobii eReader, Patriot X Porter flash drive, Asus Nexus 7” 3G tablet, Samsung Galaxy SIII, Lenovo G580 Notebook and many more. Shop now!

DStv HD PVR Decoder now R949

The DStv HD PVR Decoder has further revolutionised the television experience with lifelike viewing, sharper images, more vibrant colours and precision picture quality. Now R949, save R550. Offer valid while stocks last. Shop now!

Up to 30% off appliances & homeware

Save up to 30% on appliances and homeware this Easter! Offer valid while stocks last. Shop now.

OLX Free Classifieds [change area]

Samsung Galaxy s4

Mobile, Cell Phones in South Africa, Western Cape, Cape Town. Date October 24

Best bargain in big bay

Real Estate, Houses - Apartments for Sale in South Africa, Western Cape, Cape Town. Date October 25

VW Golf 6, 1.6 Trendline (Excellent condition)

Vehicles, Cars in South Africa, Western Cape, Cape Town. Date October 25

 

services

E-mail Alerts The latest headlines in your inbox

RSS feeds News delivered really simply.

Mobile News24 on your mobile or PDA

E-mail Newsletters You choose what you want

News24 on your iPhone Get News24 headlines on your iPhone.

SMS Alerts Get breaking news stories via SMS.

Blogs Your opinion on you, me and everyone.

Calais Website keywords automated by OpenCalais.

 
Digital Media & Marketing Association
 
© 2014 24.com. All rights reserved.
There are new stories on the homepage. Click here to see them.
 
English
Afrikaans
isiZulu

Hello 

Create Profile

Creating your profile will enable you to submit photos and stories to get published on News24.


Please provide a username for your profile page:

This username must be unique, cannot be edited and will be used in the URL to your profile page across the entire 24.com network.

Settings

Location Settings

News24 allows you to edit the display of certain components based on a location. If you wish to personalise the page based on your preferences, please select a location for each component and click "Submit" in order for the changes to take affect.








Facebook Sign-In

Hi News addict,

Join the News24 Community to be involved in breaking the news.

Log in with Facebook to comment and personalise news, weather and listings.