I may be a man of letters, and in fact am, my name alone containing a number of them. Not only a man of letters, however, but even words, yes, entire words, but a man of intertwined snakes, I am not. Nor of medicine.
Nevertheless, being a man of limited medical knowledge, and not a doctor, as by now I’m sure you are aware, there are nevertheless things medical which puzzle me and urgently need addressing. These things are logical even to someone of so limited an intellect as myself, or should that be me? I do not even qualify for entry to a South African University, but still, even I can see the quandary here.
With winter on the way and the flu season hot on its chapped heels, there is always the little conundrum that baffles me: the flu injection. How does it work? Let me enlighten you.
We don’t want to get flu, now do we? So what do we do? We hie ourselves off to the doctor for a flu injection, which then gives us the flu, so we don’t get…….the flu! It’s utter genius!
But you see the paradox?
I don’t want to get sick, so I go to someone who makes me sick so I don’t get sick?
This is akin to a mechanic putting sugar in your petrol tank so your car would break down so it wouldn’t break down. And it smacks of conspiracy, I would think. But conspiracy is such an ugly word, isn’t it?
It puts me in mind of the man taking out all the full page ads in The Star and other publications, claiming that the war in Iraq, global warming and ingrown toenails are all a conspiracy by the multinational pharmaceutical companies. Many of whom, if this man can be believed, own countries!
So off I went to the doctor to do a little research, as we men of science are wont to do. And sitting in the doctor’s rooms, reading all the latest magazines…isn’t it sad about the Titanic?…and composing in my mind the questions I would ask the doctor, my mind wandered and I followed it, all the way out the door and down the street and never got to ask my question.
But where my mind wandered, now that was interesting. Because if this is a conspiracy, it has caught on outside the medical world. In fact, well outside the medical world and to every area of our existence.
Rudolf Strauelli definitely cottoned on to it. More than cottoned on to it, in fact. He mastered it! Inject the Springboks with defeat and they would lose so often that they would win! What a stroke of genius. And Jake White gets all the credit! How unfair can life be?
The Springboks were obviously laying the seed for the destruction of the other teams in the competition by these devious means. And the other teams had no idea what lay in wait for them. Maybe Rudolf Strauelli is an undercover doctor?
But could it be taken even further?
Tell the world about the Iraqi weapons of mass destruction and show them nothing and, hey presto! they would be bound to believe it. After all, it’s worked for the medical profession for years!
But why stop there? There’s a whole world to be conquered by Alice logic. Or should that be Allan logic?
Allan Boesak is a doctor; after all, he bears the honorific before his name. I stole the donor funds, but I didn’t steal the donor funds. How can I seek a Presidential Pardon for something I both did and didn’t do? How far is that removed from a flu injection? Or is that carrying conspiracy too far? Maybe he’s a struggle doctor?
So, the question is really this; if a non-medical person asks a question on matters medical, does that invalidate the question? And if so, does the doctor then have the right to question the mechanic on why his car is still making that funny rattling noise?
In my really very humble opinion, there is more to quantum physics than really meets the eye.
After all, quantum physics states that a thing can both be and not be simultaneously, and the medical profession and politicians and, in fact, rugby coaches have just proven it. Over and over and over again.
Or perhaps not.