PLEASE NOTE:

MyNews24 is a user-generated section of News24.com. The stories here come from users.

 
The Real Harry Potter
 
Comments: 8
Article views: 709
 
 
Latest Badges:



 
View all The Real Harry Potter's badges.
 

Long-Distance Dating: Yes or No?

22 May 2012, 14:08

So, you have been through the “Shopping Trolley” process, and you have done the “Parallel Dating” thing. (You may have even been dumped.) But somewhere along this process you are bound to be tempted to get involved in the unknown (or known?) wonderland of long-distance dating.

For some this is a known taboo area of dating. Depending on the distance, it could be argued that it is not dating at all; hence the possible more popular term: “long-distance relationship”.

Now I have rather kept with the word “dating” to fit in with the lighter side of this animal… “Relationship” suggests that you are on the road to something long-term or even marriage, and being a long-distance relationship, it would appear to be a very ominous road to travel with all of those unknowns!

Actually I would like to set a cat amongst the pigeons at this point: would it be possible that the online dating experience is better suited to long-distance lovers due to the type of discipline it demands from its subscribers? Does it breed patience and trust? Does it encourage long-term commitment and boost respect?

In all probability the answer to the questions in the above paragraph may only be accurate depending on the people involved, but let us go against the perceived reality that men cannot “keep it in their pants”, and that the modern woman is drawn to a more hedonistic reality than the previous generation was. We will pretend for a moment that all people are as honorable as they should be.

I know a lady that is convinced she is to be saved from a difficult life as a single mother, and how? Answer: By a long-distance boyfriend that would eventually marry her and accept her children as if they were his own. Now class…. Can anyone see where the problems begin? Pick one:

1.  1.  He hasn’t experienced life with her children in the house over any length of time.

2.   2.  He hasn’t experienced the lady’s approach to daily discipline over any length of time.

3.   3.  She hasn’t experienced the man’s approach to being the head of the household, and his form of discipline over her children.

4.   4.  She has chosen to rely on him to supply the happiness in her life. (As in “Dumped”.)

5.   5.  He is under pressure to provide the happiness in her life, without failing, and with the added stress of her children.

6.   6.  All of the above.


No bonus points for a partially-correct answer on this one! (And I do hope that I am wrong!)

What? Oh, so now you say I am cynical? I know I am, but if I must open up my book of beliefs and read a few to you, you may be surprised to find out that I’m a believer in true love, in love at first sight AND in soul-mates. I believe in the concept that allows for an infinite number of grey shades: “I love you” is not a term that moves mountains: it has an undefined weight depending on the user of the words… get over it!

And moving back to those beliefs: true love and soul-mates… these are the concepts that need to be grasped before we can conclude whether long-distance dating is a worthwhile exercise. True love: have you felt it? Tell me yes and I will call you ignorant. True love is not a feeling: it cannot be felt. It is the knowledge that the other person is a part of you. It is not necessarily a “forever” thing, but it could well be if preserved. How can we preserve it? That could require a book, not this article.

Soul-mates: Briefly; the concept that two people have a shared destiny: that they will feel each other’s pains and live each other’s triumphs; their thought patterns are parallel and their bodies come together as one. Of course these are ideals that we all wish for, but the chance that you would ever detect the other if you walked past them in the street is just too miniscule to imagine, and if we did we would have experienced “love at first sight”: a very uncommon occurrence! We could search for a lifetime and not find a soul-mate (although I’m convinced there is not only one such mate per person);

So with these concepts in hand, and remembering that we are now in a world full of ideal people, let us move back to the animal that is long-distance dating. Could it work? Should it work? Would it work? I contend that with enough long-distance communication, it is possible to better detect the probability of a future “true love” and of a “soul-mate”…. Less physical interaction to cloud the logic… so to answer those three questions in order:  yes, yes, and…. erm… who knows?

Disclaimer: All articles and letters published on MyNews24 have been independently written by members of News24's community. The views of users published on News24 are therefore their own and do not necessarily represent the views of News24. News24 editors also reserve the right to edit or delete any and all comments received.

 

24.com publishes all comments posted on articles provided that they adhere to our Comments Policy. Should you wish to report a comment for editorial review, please do so by clicking the 'Report Comment' button to the right of each comment.

Comment on this story
8 comments
Comments have been closed for this article.

Read more from our Users

Submitted by
Muneer Richards
Oscar is murderer, regardless of ...

I will admit that for a long time I bought into the notion that Oscar Pistorius killed Reeva Steenkamp in a jealous rage, after she had locked herself in a toilet cubicle to get away from him.  Read more...

0 comments 1529 views
Submitted by
John Johnston
Low cost houses in leafy suburbs

The subject of pockets of land in the leafy suburbs formed part of a debate that was om national television some time ago. Read more...

0 comments 354 views
Submitted by
Colin Webster452
The two men that will lead SA's P...

The big one comes around every year in the form of IeSF's annual World Championships. Read more...

0 comments 50 views
Submitted by
Abwana Boomklouf
Economic sustainability

In our current global economic situation, I feel we are going about things the wrong way, and in so doing, we are are essentially looking at certain things the wrong way. Read more...

0 comments 234 views
Submitted by
IzakNieuwoudt
Oscar Pistorius - a couch expert'...

If it were not for the TV cameras and the bloated personalities the case would have been over in days, probably with the eventual conclusion. Read more...

0 comments 1047 views
Submitted by
Jaded Knight
The Oscar Pistorius Debacle - He'...

I have perused a few articles over the last few days with regards to the seemingly never-ending Oscar saga.  Read more...

0 comments 1735 views
 

services

E-mail Alerts The latest headlines in your inbox

RSS feeds News delivered really simply.

Mobile News24 on your mobile or PDA

E-mail Newsletters You choose what you want

News24 on Android Get the latest from News24 on your Android device.

SMS Alerts Get breaking news stories via SMS.

TV Get us in your home, on your television.

 
Interactive Advertising Bureau
 
© 2016 24.com. All rights reserved.
There are new stories on the homepage. Click here to see them.
 
English
Afrikaans
isiZulu

Hello 

Create Profile

Creating your profile will enable you to submit photos and stories to get published on News24.


Please provide a username for your profile page:

This username must be unique, cannot be edited and will be used in the URL to your profile page across the entire 24.com network.

Settings

Location Settings

News24 allows you to edit the display of certain components based on a location. If you wish to personalise the page based on your preferences, please select a location for each component and click "Submit" in order for the changes to take affect.




Facebook Sign-In

Hi News addict,

Join the News24 Community to be involved in breaking the news.

Log in with Facebook to comment and personalise news, weather and listings.