Disclaimer: Please note that this article is not meant to be taken seriously. Except the part about the Crocs...and the Speedo...and the last sentence. Otherwise, it's just a bit of light-hearted fun. (Trust me on the crocs though!)
Okay, so we’ve all read the fashion mistakes women make in endless fashion magazine spreads but do the guys know what mistakes they make? So here is a list of things that some men make when it comes to that department:
- Too much cologne: Drenching yourself in Dolce & Gabbana does not make you look like David Gandy reclining in a little yacht in the Mediterranean. It just makes you smelly.
- Crocs: Just. No.
- Rugby Shirts on a date…in fact Rugby shirts anywhere but in a Rugby stadium: Repeat after me: “I are not a rugby player” .
- Soccer Shirts on a date...again, unless you’re Lionel Messi or Itumeleng Khune, please don’t.
- Novelty Ties: I want to know you’re a man, not a man-child. Leave the Garfield and Tweety-bird ties to the comedians.
- Socks with Sandals: It makes you look like a prat. A badly dressed prat.
- Short sleeves with a tie: Only do this if you want women to run away screaming thinking you’re a serial killer.
- Speedos: Unless you have the physique of David Beckham…just don’t do it.
- Gelled spikes: What are you? Fourteen years old? Get a real haircut please.
- T-shirts tucked in with a beer boep: A women with a tummy will NEVER tuck her shirt in. The same applies to you. You’re not Buddha, you’re just fat.
- A comb-over: Just shave it already. Some of the most attractive men in the world have receding hairlines…or no hair at all. Kevin Spacey. Vin Diesel. Billy Zane. Yul Brynner. (Okay, scrap the last one!)
- Gold or Platinum Teeth: Are you Fiddy Cent? If not, then don’t go there!
- Wrinkled Clothes: I know most guys are allergic to an iron but looking like a slob isn’t going to endear you to anyone. If you can’t do it, ask your mom. Or pay someone to do it.
- Mis-matched suit and shoes: Are you colour-blind? Do you not know that brown shoes don’t go with black? Gray does not match Navy?
- Running shoes aka tackies aka sneakers with a suit: Who even started this trend? Just ridiculous.
- Over-branding: Wow. You can afford Nike, Ed Hardy, Hugo Boss? I’m so impressed…but ALL at the same time?
If you’ve made any of the above mistakes, it doesn’t make you a bad guy, just misinformed. If you don’t know what goes with what...then call me! Or call any woman to hand. She’ll soon put you right, because as you know, women know everything
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