PLEASE NOTE:

MyNews24 is a user-generated section of News24.com. The stories here come from users.

 
ZION
 
Comments: 14
Article views: 320
 
 
Latest Badges:



 
View all ZION's badges.
 

New Year's resolutions

10 December 2012, 10:35
NEW  YEARS  RESOLUTIONS.    

The time has come to say good bye to a year which  proceeded forwards and backwards at its own whim and driven by those that can and those that cannot govern. Time and the country.  The resolutions for next year as appearing here will provide that driving force and direction for those that cannot govern. 

1)  My profile will wear a NZ rugby Jersey despite the national hysteria

2)  No more serious mining articles will be  submitted

3)  More dagga articles will be produced and based upon the truth

4)  No more reply-comments supplied to trolls.

5)  Trolling will be prohibited and any indications of a troll will call up a witch hunt for trolls.

6)  Report a mandatory 50% of comments as abusive. And obscene.

7)  Only articles relating to mining in Guam, Easter Island, Valparais and Timbucto will be considered for publication.

8)  Report all sentences with “LOL” in it as it is an abuse of language.

9)  Proclaim loudly that global warming is not a conspiracy and 98% of scientists believe in the human aspect and causes.

10) Demand vehemently that dagga is gagga and kakka.

11) Demand vehemently, with much burning and breaking, that dagga will never be legalised in this country while we are still alive.

12)  Never include, or refer to the “American Dream” in any article due to possible nuclear retaliation

13)  Never write about fishing as a subject due to all the fish being caught on one hook, line and sinker on a single cast.

14)  When discussing war casualties add one more because it will be your own.  When discussing war casualties, admit you are lying and the source is lying too and there never, ever, ever were  war casualties in the first place.

15) When discussing Seal culling never use the words: murder, killing, slaughtering, wiping-out, putting-down, restructuring, removing to a habitat on Sable Island and forced removals to an island close to Cape Town.

16)  Never besmirch Canada because, despite their non-existent rugby abilities they are the next door neighbours  of  our Happy-go-lucky-nuclear nation.

17)  Never discuss “Is there a God?”  Because we all know there is no God.

18)  Never discuss ”There is a God because we all know there is no God.

19)  Avoid positive critic of the ANC because they are always positive.

20)  When writing about Bob - next - door give him an iota of doubt.

21)  When writing about JFK please reserve a prison cell for yourself and with no guns within a 2km radius.   
Disclaimer: All articles and letters published on MyNews24 have been independently written by members of News24's community. The views of users published on News24 are therefore their own and do not necessarily represent the views of News24. News24 editors also reserve the right to edit or delete any and all comments received.

 

24.com publishes all comments posted on articles provided that they adhere to our Comments Policy. Should you wish to report a comment for editorial review, please do so by clicking the 'Report Comment' button to the right of each comment.

Comment on this story
14 comments
Comments have been closed for this article.

Read more from our Users

Submitted by
Aye'Dom Okoliko
Nigeria in the light of Buhari’s ...

"Once social change begins, it cannot be reversed. You cannot un-educate [sic] the person who has learned to read. You cannot humiliate the person who feels pride. You cannot oppress the people who are not afraid anymore. We have seen the future, and the future is ours." Read more...

0 comments 144 views
Submitted by
TiisetsoMakhele
South Africa needs a second peopl...

A revolution is commonly defined as a fundamental change of a government or social order to a new system. Unlike reform, which refers to quantitative changes to certain, often external aspects of the system, revolution relates to a change of the entire system. Read more...

0 comments 445 views
Submitted by
Roxy Belara
Security and Poverty in South Afr...

In 2016 alone there was a total of 543524 property related crimes according to crimstatssa.com. These include theft of motor vehicle, burglary at non-residential and residential premises.  Read more...

0 comments 188 views
Submitted by
Lee Niemandt
Parents today have lost the plot

Parents today are missing the plot completely… A wise man once told me, if you want to know how to face a fast bowler, don’t speak to a fast bowler, speak to the opening batsman. Read more...

0 comments 1001 views
Submitted by
Revelgen
It's Time - South Africa simply c...

Every single day brings new revelations of crooked deals by the ANC head honchos and their families, stealing billions from the poor. Read more...

0 comments 1115 views
Submitted by
Jonathan de Bruin
Differently abled

As a disabled person it is disheartening knowing that we recently celebrated our 23rd anniversary of democracy and not much has been done to narrow the gap between disabled and non-disabled people. Read more...

0 comments 123 views
 

services

E-mail Alerts The latest headlines in your inbox

RSS feeds News delivered really simply.

Mobile News24 on your mobile or PDA

E-mail Newsletters You choose what you want

News24 on Android Get the latest from News24 on your Android device.

SMS Alerts Get breaking news stories via SMS.

TV Get us in your home, on your television.

 
Interactive Advertising Bureau
 
© 2017 24.com. All rights reserved.
There are new stories on the homepage. Click here to see them.
 
English
Afrikaans
isiZulu

Hello 

Create Profile

Creating your profile will enable you to submit photos and stories to get published on News24.


Please provide a username for your profile page:

This username must be unique, cannot be edited and will be used in the URL to your profile page across the entire 24.com network.

Settings

Location Settings

News24 allows you to edit the display of certain components based on a location. If you wish to personalise the page based on your preferences, please select a location for each component and click "Submit" in order for the changes to take affect.




Facebook Sign-In

Hi News addict,

Join the News24 Community to be involved in breaking the news.

Log in with Facebook to comment and personalise news, weather and listings.