NEW YEARS RESOLUTIONS.
The time has come to say good bye to a year which proceeded forwards and backwards at its own whim and driven by those that can and those that cannot govern. Time and the country. The resolutions for next year as appearing here will provide that driving force and direction for those that cannot govern.
1) My profile will wear a NZ rugby Jersey despite the national hysteria
2) No more serious mining articles will be submitted
3) More dagga articles will be produced and based upon the truth
4) No more reply-comments supplied to trolls.
5) Trolling will be prohibited and any indications of a troll will call up a witch hunt for trolls.
6) Report a mandatory 50% of comments as abusive. And obscene.
7) Only articles relating to mining in Guam, Easter Island, Valparais and Timbucto will be considered for publication.
8) Report all sentences with “LOL” in it as it is an abuse of language.
9) Proclaim loudly that global warming is not a conspiracy and 98% of scientists believe in the human aspect and causes.
10) Demand vehemently that dagga is gagga and kakka.
11) Demand vehemently, with much burning and breaking, that dagga will never be legalised in this country while we are still alive.
12) Never include, or refer to the “American Dream” in any article due to possible nuclear retaliation
13) Never write about fishing as a subject due to all the fish being caught on one hook, line and sinker on a single cast.
14) When discussing war casualties add one more because it will be your own. When discussing war casualties, admit you are lying and the source is lying too and there never, ever, ever were war casualties in the first place.
15) When discussing Seal culling never use the words: murder, killing, slaughtering, wiping-out, putting-down, restructuring, removing to a habitat on Sable Island and forced removals to an island close to Cape Town.
16) Never besmirch Canada because, despite their non-existent rugby abilities they are the next door neighbours of our Happy-go-lucky-nuclear nation.
17) Never discuss “Is there a God?” Because we all know there is no God.
18) Never discuss ”There is a God because we all know there is no God.
19) Avoid positive critic of the ANC because they are always positive.
20) When writing about Bob - next - door give him an iota of doubt.
21) When writing about JFK please reserve a prison cell for yourself and with no guns within a 2km radius.
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