Spring and summer use to be my favourite seasons - until some imbecile introduced leggings and lied to women, telling them that it’s fine to wear leggings on their lonesome.
I would take the liberty to explain to you what leggings are, but I figure they scarcely need a definition for many of you know already know what these articles of clothing are: underwear, belonging to the tights and petticoat family. They’re meant to be teamed up with hot pants, overlapping tops and shirt-dresses.
This is the part that has clearly eluded the greater part of the female species, as they have substituted these undergarments for pants. Just like satin, leggings aren’t exactly cellulite friendly: they reveal body parts that are not meant to be seen by the public. Thanks to leggings for inspiring young women to wear opaques and silky stockings with tops just long enough to cover their bottoms.
If, like me, you’ve had the misfortune of walking behind a lady wearing leggings, you would understand why I'm venting out. Seeing someone's rear is not a laughing matter - it is as disturbing as seeing a reed-slim man in a vest.
Young women wear these items with regular tops that reveal their gigantic bottoms - and, of course, camel toes.
Oh, please, don’t you dare for a second think that you’re off the hook just because you are a size zero: this, sweetie, applies to you too! Leggings are underwear and thus should remain as such.
Doesn’t it bother you that when wearing a top with leggings, the entire Grahamstown sees the colour of your panties - another item that should never under any circumstances be seen in public (is that not why they are called underwear)?
I understand that summer can be unbearably hot and we all often feel the need to wear as little as possible to keep cool, but wearing leggings as they are is not decent. I don’t care if Beyonce and Paris Hilton wear them and look perfectly fine. The fact remains, leggings are not pants and they will never be, no matter who wears them.
Here is a tip to keep cool: wear maxi dresses, or loose-fitting pants. If that doesn’t go down well, then wear good old jeans.
There are millions of children slaving 12 hours a day all over the world making jeans for you to wear - don't let their hard work amount to nothing.
Personally, I have no desire to know the colour of your panties, nor how many lumps and bumps you have acquired over winter.
So please put something decent on! Now!
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