PLEASE NOTE:

MyNews24 is a user-generated section of News24.com. The stories here come from users.

 
Enzo
 
Comments: 63
Article views: 1073
 
 
Latest Badges:


 
View all Enzo's badges.
 

Religious predictions for 2013

11 January 2013, 15:29

Things that won’t happen during 2013:

1.       God will not return to earth to come and “save his children”.

2.       There will be no Armageddon where good will defeat evil and us godless beings engulfed by flames.

3.       As with last year, and the years before, no evidence for the existence of god will be discovered.

4.       No miracle that can directly be attributed to the sole intervention of god will be independently captured (filmed) and validated.

5.       Unfortunately for amputees, no limbs will regrow as a result of prayer or any other godly intervention.

6.       There will be no public appearance by god to tell us to stop our sh*t.

7.       No ghost, demon, spirit, etc. will be “caught” or captured on film and its existence proved independently.

8.       Despite the daily threats and warnings from his followers, god will not smite me for mocking him and his herd.

Things that will happen during 2013:

9.       People who pray to god will still die of illness, hunger, car accidents, murder, natural disasters; just like their non-praying peers.

10.   People who pray to god will still fail exams, have pre-marital sex, swear, lie, hate, be jealous, lose, drink and drug; just like their non-praying peers.

11.   Despite the thousands of existing religious denominations, new ones will emerge.

12.   Church leaders will have sex with children.

13.   The devil will be blamed for points 9—12.

So predictable, isn’t it? I am happy to provide a 100% guarantee on the outcome of the above; we can do an assessment on 31.12.13.

Disclaimer: All articles and letters published on MyNews24 have been independently written by members of News24's community. The views of users published on News24 are therefore their own and do not necessarily represent the views of News24. News24 editors also reserve the right to edit or delete any and all comments received.

 

24.com publishes all comments posted on articles provided that they adhere to our Comments Policy. Should you wish to report a comment for editorial review, please do so by clicking the 'Report Comment' button to the right of each comment.

Comment on this story
63 comments
Comments have been closed for this article.

Read more from our Users

Submitted by
Debbie Brain
Should we all be a one style vote...

What if years of your experience of a voter meant that you could not vote for anything other then a sky that was not beached upon the sand of someone else's misgiving self-opinionated ignorance? Read more...

0 comments 0 views
Submitted by
Wayne Rittmann
A hero bust...

I am quite amazed at the current predicament of the gun-carrying citizen who recently shot a hijacker dead, when said hijacker had already shot and injured his victim, was trying to steal his vehicle, and was chasing after him to do more damage with a gun.  Read more...

0 comments 0 views
Elias Motsoaledi Local Council Ma...

The ANC through its own spokesperson on radio publicly said that the immediate suspension of the Mayor is not debatable, as it is ANC policy that public funds cannot be utilised to advance political parties. Read more...

0 comments 0 views
Submitted by
Stefan Kriek
Oscars: A case for diversity

In his recent column, Phumlani Majozi weighed in on the recent #OscarsSoWhite2016 controversy asking whether it’s really necessary to boycott the Oscars for its, once again, lack of diversity. Read more...

0 comments 0 views
Submitted by
Vuyisa Qabaka
Morocco is Afri-CAN

This time last week I was sitting at a golf course in Marrakesh (Morocco), although grateful to be home (we live in one of the best parts of one of the best cities in the world).  Read more...

0 comments 787 views
Submitted by
Isak Tait
Racism

Racism is the idea that one race is superior to another and the expression of this conviction, normally with negative intent. Read more...

0 comments 564 views
 

services

E-mail Alerts The latest headlines in your inbox

RSS feeds News delivered really simply.

Mobile News24 on your mobile or PDA

E-mail Newsletters You choose what you want

News24 on Android Get the latest from News24 on your Android device.

SMS Alerts Get breaking news stories via SMS.

TV Get us in your home, on your television.

 
Interactive Advertising Bureau
 
© 2016 24.com. All rights reserved.
There are new stories on the homepage. Click here to see them.
 
English
Afrikaans
isiZulu

Hello 

Create Profile

Creating your profile will enable you to submit photos and stories to get published on News24.


Please provide a username for your profile page:

This username must be unique, cannot be edited and will be used in the URL to your profile page across the entire 24.com network.

Settings

Location Settings

News24 allows you to edit the display of certain components based on a location. If you wish to personalise the page based on your preferences, please select a location for each component and click "Submit" in order for the changes to take affect.




Facebook Sign-In

Hi News addict,

Join the News24 Community to be involved in breaking the news.

Log in with Facebook to comment and personalise news, weather and listings.