PLEASE NOTE:

MyNews24 is a user-generated section of News24.com. The stories here come from users.

 
Tyronehster
 
Comments: 13
Article views: 875
 
 
Latest Badges:



 
View all Tyronehster's badges.
 

SANTACO Meeting

27 December 2012, 10:03

‘Hey, magents, hey!’ Jebson hammers his one litre Black Label bottle on the table. Everyone turns to look at him.  ‘I want to talk to you, and all you do is warra warra, how can we have a meeting if you do that?’

They quieten down slowly and, as the noise subsides, he looks at these men, his men, his bread and butter. Empty KFC boxes and Black Label one litre bottles litter the table. They’ve had their socialising; now it’s time for business.

He looks down at a roster prepared before the meeting. Now he looks up: ‘Johannes, Sipho, Innocent, Mwage, Phineas, you’ve got yellow line duty this week.’

There’s a huge outcry at this. ‘No, Bra Jeb, why you choose us? You know if we drive in the yellow lines, the cops they stop us!’

‘But I give you bribe money?'

‘Ya, Bra Jeb, but sometimes they don’t want that bribe, they want to give us a ticket.’

‘Ya?’ He looks at them, head askance. ‘You are supposed to tear up those tickets.’

‘Ya, Bra Jeb, but they got a computer, and they keep those tickets on the computer, then they know how many we throw away!’

‘So what’s the problem?’

Johannes is pleading now. ‘Bra Jeb, they impound our taxis, then we have to catch another taxi!’

At this, the hall erupts in laughter. Johannes turns on them. ‘Ya, you can laugh because it’s not you, but you cry also when Bra Jeb gives you this job!’

That results in even more laughter, because it’s true that they all hate this job more than any other, and they don’t have to do it this week.

Bra Jeb looks at Johannes. ‘Did I ask you to do it, Johannes, or did I tell you?’ Johannes drops his gaze and sits down sulkily. ‘Yellow line driving is important: I won’t just ask you because I like it! We must show them we are the bosses; their laws are not for us.’

‘Oka-a-a-ay! Next. Boetie, Hlompho, Lazarus, Sibo: parking in front of stop streets to pick up passengers. The important thing is to sit with your finger out the window and wait for passengers. When the line of cars is nice and long, put on your hazards and pull straight into the traffic and, when they hoot, say thanks.’ There are no complaints with this one; everyone likes this, and the four of them are smiling broadly.

‘Now, Casper, Kgomotso, Darius, Moses, Genius: turning right from the straight only lane. This is also important, and you must look straight in front of you when you do it. If you look at them and point to the spot in front of them, that is begging. We are the bosses of the road; we designed those routes.’ There are plenty of nods around the table now. ‘The only thing you can do that is better, is to do a u turn from the middle lane, especially when there are plenty of cars waiting to turn, and the flasher is already orange.’

‘Okay, next one. Phumi, Zondo, Jacob, Isaac: going through the red light before it’s green or after it’s turned red. If other cars have to swerve, it’s even better.’

‘Aah, Bra Jeb,’ says Jacob. ‘Last week some momparrah hit my taxi on the driver’s door. Not the passengers, but me!’

‘You want to find yourself another job, Jacob?’

Jacob looks down; he knows when he’s beaten. ‘No Bra Jeb.’

‘Good, then you just do what I tell you, okay?’

Jacob nods and picks up his beer. ‘Ya, Bra Jeb.’

‘Now, Job, Jackie, Samson, Justus, your job for the week is overtaking cars and then stopping in front of them to pick up passengers’

Loud whistles from these four: this is everyone’s favourite.

‘Last one: BRT. Ezekiel, John, Molepi, Kgaso. You must drive in the BRT lanes in the morning when it’s busy, then stop and hold out your finger and wait for passengers. The more the busses pile up behind you, the better for you. These people stole our routes, and now they are trying to steal our business. We can only stop them if we make them go very slow.’

He looks down the table now.’ I’ve got only one small complaint, but we can fix it next time. When we go on the go-slow on the e-toll road with Cosatu, we must stop to pick up passengers, otherwise we lose all our money. Okay, that’s all, now you can party, but if you can pick up some passengers on the way home, try and drive straight.’

He sits down and picks up his beer. Ya, he showed them who’s the boss, and they won’t forget in a hurry. President Zuma would be proud of him.

Disclaimer: All articles and letters published on MyNews24 have been independently written by members of News24's community. The views of users published on News24 are therefore their own and do not necessarily represent the views of News24. News24 editors also reserve the right to edit or delete any and all comments received.
 

Read News24’s Comments Policy

24.com publishes all comments posted on articles provided that they adhere to our Comments Policy. Should you wish to report a comment for editorial review, please do so by clicking the 'Report Comment' button to the right of each comment.

Comment on this story
13 comments
Add your comment
Comment 0 characters remaining

Read more from our Users

Submitted by
Terrylin Backpackers
The cheque is in the post

"I hear you are in bond collections. What are the latest excuses people are coming up with these days? I've run out of ideas." Read more...

0 comments 0 views
Submitted by
Meta
News in the digital age

How do you think that spreading your hate/bigotry and or intolerance helps anybody? Read more...

13 comments 930 views
Submitted by
Brian Faul
How and why a Dictator is born

One needs to remember looking back in history these hard times is when a dictator is more likely to get born. It is during these hard times that a dictator gets voted into power. Read more...

9 comments 1702 views
Submitted by
Prenisha Naidoo
I will be proactive...

This letter is in response to articles on the death of baby Jamie Naidoo, We have the tendency to be reactive…we wait for something to happen, then suddenly we care, writes a News24 User. Read more...

2 comments 419 views
Submitted by
woadstress
Celebration

Make a list of at least ten things that you can celebrate, and write two or three reasons why you can celebrate those things or events. Read more...

1 comments 147 views
Submitted by
Eric de Castro
Last squeak of the year

 Read more...

12 comments 194 views

Jobs in Cape Town [change area]

Property [change area]

Travel - Look, Book, Go!

Kalahari.com - shop online today

2DAYS ONLY – 30% off Appliances

Coffee makers, blenders, fans, juicers and more. T&Cs apply. Shop now!

2 DAYS ONLY – 40% off books

Get 40% off when you buy 2 books. For two days only! T&Cs apply. Buy now!

Up to 50% off on outdoor gear

Save on chairs, blankets, cooler bags, umbrellas and more. Shop now!

Save on Samsung

Cameras, mobile phones, TVs, Tablets and more. While stocks last. Shop now!

Grand Theft Auto 5

Now available on PS4, Xbox One and PC from R649. Buy now!

OLX Free Classifieds [change area]

Samsung Galaxy s4

Mobile, Cell Phones in South Africa, Western Cape, Cape Town. Date October 24

Best bargain in big bay

Real Estate, Houses - Apartments for Sale in South Africa, Western Cape, Cape Town. Date October 25

VW Golf 6, 1.6 Trendline (Excellent condition)

Vehicles, Cars in South Africa, Western Cape, Cape Town. Date October 25

 

services

E-mail Alerts The latest headlines in your inbox

RSS feeds News delivered really simply.

Mobile News24 on your mobile or PDA

E-mail Newsletters You choose what you want

News24 on your iPhone Get News24 headlines on your iPhone.

SMS Alerts Get breaking news stories via SMS.

Blogs Your opinion on you, me and everyone.

Calais Website keywords automated by OpenCalais.

 
Interactive Advertising Bureau
 
© 2014 24.com. All rights reserved.
There are new stories on the homepage. Click here to see them.
 
English
Afrikaans
isiZulu

Hello 

Create Profile

Creating your profile will enable you to submit photos and stories to get published on News24.


Please provide a username for your profile page:

This username must be unique, cannot be edited and will be used in the URL to your profile page across the entire 24.com network.

Settings

Location Settings

News24 allows you to edit the display of certain components based on a location. If you wish to personalise the page based on your preferences, please select a location for each component and click "Submit" in order for the changes to take affect.








Facebook Sign-In

Hi News addict,

Join the News24 Community to be involved in breaking the news.

Log in with Facebook to comment and personalise news, weather and listings.