He once committed huri-kiri live on this site, swearing to never again assault our senses with his ZION-ism’s. But just as his detractors popped the cork to his demise, a mere 24 hours later he reared his handsome head from the grave with a “Jirre guys, don’t know what to say, but its lekker to be back!”
He is of course an institution on News24 (some would say a mental institution, but who are we to judge?) and is well on the way to becoming its most prolific poster, submitting 2,3 even 5 articles in one day.
We have endured his mining exploits- who can forget his infamous underground poo fight? And we know all about his strong feelings regards the evil of dagga, even if he sounds gerook while writing about them.
If you need to know about non-existent potholes in Kroonstad, ZION is your man (always spelt with capitals, he loves those capitals, especially when he is angry, which is quite often). Suspect an evil twin-planet earth rotating out of view behind the sun? ZION has the the scoop with his counter-earth-pythagorean-astronomy.
But it is his poetry which sets him apart. ZION has a God-given gift to make his leaden words soar, as we read about fogdogs and Hecate and the warlock with its Incipit tail of lust.
In many ways ZION is the Ignatius J. Reilly of News24 (for those that have not yet discovered A Confederacy of Dunces, it includes some great lines from the over-weight, contemptuous Ignatius, like this one: “I am at the moment writing a lengthy indictment against our century. When my brain begins to reel from my literary labors, I make an occasional cheese dip.”)
So ZION, don’t stop with those lengthy indictments against us mere mortals. And if anyone dares comment with a counter view, go straight for the jugular like you did last week -- “And you are a bloody fool, Nice words from a fool. what is your age anyway because I feel you are just another big mouth laaity. Your bombastic types make me kots.”
Your subtlety as always, is absolutely priceless!
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