So I see the Free state government dropped 40 bar on their new website/suit of websites. Which is all fine and well, but one has to ask…where’s the porn?
Near as I can tell I personally contributed 250 000.00 of my tax Rands to this site over the past 12 months and I must say; Son, I am disappoint. This is not what I’d call getting my money’s worth. Forget for a moment that said tax was supposed to buy me access to decent healthcare, a functioning police service on an e-toll free road, and let’s just focus on customer satisfaction here. And I am not satisfied.
I’ve had a look at the websites in question and it’s all taking heads and Calibri font. With a bit of Flash thrown in here and there so that Zoomer is also allowed his chance to shine. But not a single slippery nipple or poorly concealed butt crack anywhere. Okay, revise that, I guess the Flash does allow one to see a butt crack but I understand it is dangerous to refer to Spearhead in that manner. Anyway, you get my point. How is it possible in this day and age to produce a website for $4.4 million and not get yourself any action for it? Like nothing! For that kind of loot I’m sure someone could have convinced Paris Hilton to do an update of her sex tape and put all those acting lessons to some good work by ramping up her pretend interest in what she was doing. She might even consent to leaving her phone on vibrate for a while. Hell, I bet for that money even Kim Kardashian would let us see her vajayjay.
Although now that she’s preggers that does seem a bit obscene. Still, were talking new Bentley money, and at least one taillight of said Bentley was paid for by me, which is why I demand at least some fapping content here. “Demand” is the right word, innit? I’m Generation X so that whole “we demand” thing has not really sunk in with me yet since our whole bit until now was to work towards your goals yourself without having to demand anything but the chance to try. But now that I’ve been so royally and straight-facedly screwed, I demand to see some screwing. And I mean the real thing, not the metaphoric thing where I keep pouring money into a bottomless pit of corruption and nepotism just to be told that I’m and miserly white fart that has “an agenda against black businessmen”. No, I demand a Hi-def, full screen viewing experience, complete with Dolby surround sound and an interactive option. And I want to be able to choose the setting where the boinking takes place. And the linen. Yeah…linen….
Or hey, how about this. Instead of spending ridiculous amounts of money on websites that should have cost a tenth of the eventual price tag, let’s build some RDP houses! Way I hear it you can get one for about R 50000.00. So that’s 800 houses! Like wow! That’s almost a whole Free State dorp right there. Or how about providing some food/electricity/running water/basic human dignity to those kids who have to raise their siblings because their parents are both dead due to the ineffectiveness of beetroot and garlic in combatting AIDS? Hell, I’ll even go so far as to say that money could have been better spent on something as menial as fixing potholes in the Free State roads.
Then again, what do I know? I’m just the cash cow around here, good for moaning about the government and then paying my taxes anyway. How could I possibly be able to conceive of how difficult it is to run a Country, never mind a Provincial Department, never mind a website.
Oh wait. I do do that already.
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