JUST like a band or gang of superheroes
needs members who have different talents
and powers, a circle of friends should have
exactly the same thing.
"It's important to have diversity and to be
able to look for support from a variety of
sources," says clinical and coaching
psychologist and founder of the The Positivity
Institute, Dr. Suzy Green. "They also help us
to keep broader perspective on life."
Domonique Bertolucci, life coach and author
of The Happiness Code , agrees.
"You need different types of friends in the
same way that you need food from different
food groups. Different types of friends serve
different purposes and nourish and enrich
our lives in different ways."
While many of us are lucky to count our real
friends on one hand, there are certain types
of people it?s good to have around. So, how
many do you know?
THE FRIEND WHO'S COOLER THAN YOU
The world changes quickly and some people
are just that little bit better at keeping up
with what's hip than we are. Like those
friends who know that NO ONE EVER says
"hip" any more, for instance. We like to be
around these people, because they're a
beacon of cool. Cool things just flock to them.
These are the people who help you to open
your eyes, have a flow-on effect for
introducing you to other cool people and help
to unstick yourself from the rut that's all too
easy to get bogged in. "These people enrich
your life by exposing you to things that may
have otherwise have passed you by," says
THE FRIEND WHO IS UP FOR ANYTHING
People are busy, we get it. But there's
nothing more frustrating than having to
reschedule your re-re-re-scheduled catch-up.
Everyone needs a friend who you can call at
the drop of a hat. A friend who says "hell
yeah, I'm up for that". That's why it's good to
have a mate who you don't need to issue a
28-day notice to just to meet for a
frappuccino. It's refreshing (the friend, that
is, not necessarily the frappuccino.) "This
friend is the flexible, no frills friend who
makes your life a breeze. Nothing is ever too
hard and they're open to doing new things
and changing plans at short notice,? says Dr.
Green. While Bertolucci agrees, "Their
enthusiasm is contagious and you always
have more fun when they are around."
THE FRIEND WHO YOU ASPIRE TO BE
Oprah Winfrey once said: "Surround yourself
with only people who are going to lift you
higher". And we all need to live life a little
bit closer to Oprah. These people challenge
you to be the best version of yourself. The
only downside is that sometimes they can be
infuriating and inspiring in equal measure.
Dr. Green's advice: "This friend is only an
important role model if they behave in ways
that are authentic and genuine. They will see
the best in you and give you important
feedback on both your strengths and
THE FRIEND WHO DOESNT KNOW ANY OF
YOUR OTHER FRIENDS
We like integration. We like killing two birds
with one stone by catching up with several
groups of friends at once. But there are times
when you need to make an S.O.S call to a
friend who is completely uninvolved and
removed from a situation who can offer
objective advice so it a bonus that your
friendship exists without orbiting around
your other ones. "There is a level of privacy
to this friendship that doesn't exist in
friendship circles,? says Bertolucci. ?It will be
easier to share some of your hopes and
dreams, fears and concerns knowing that
they are not going to be discussed when
you're not around.?
THE FRIEND WHO'S PAINFULLY HONEST
An honest friend will not always tell you what
you want to hear, but they'll certainly tell you
what you need to know like if he/she is really
that into you. When you've got a crisis on
your hands or need to make a quick decision
they are your go-to. They're also there to
keep you away from mixing paisleys and
stripes. This type of friend has the strength of
"feedback" and "is a pearl who will tell it to
you straight when others won't or will
sugarcoat things at the very least," says Dr.
Green. But she warns that this friend is
someone who does it with good intentions
and for your own benefit.
THE FRIEND YOU?VE KNOWN LONGER
THAN YOU?VE KNOWN YOURSELF
History. Sometimes it works to your
advantage, other times it doesn't. This is that
friend who sees you out of the context of
your job, your relationship, your other
friends and your life as it is now. This is the
friend who knew you when you had pimples
and a bowl cut. There is something special
about this person because they feel like
home. It's nice and comforting to be around
someone who has known you forever. "This is
a friend you never have to put on a brave
face for,? says Bertolucci. ?They know you
better than you know yourself and accept you
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