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Charles Dumbwin
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The worst drivers in SA

09 May 2012, 13:24

The worst drivers in SA

My mom had a theory, about the worst drivers in South Africa.  Over time, driving these treacherous roads (mostly around Joburg), I’ve come to realise that she was partly right, but only partly.

So this is a fun article – intended to invite responses from the News24 hordes as to who they believe the worst drivers on South Africa roads to be.

To kick start this poll, I’ve listed the following ‘driver types’, as my worst offenders:

1.      The old man with a hat - This was my mother’s pet hate, and her greatest driving fear.  Being stuck behind one of these indecisive menaces, she believed, was potentially life-threatening.  I don’t think colour/race had anything to do with her fear either.  Any old man (let’s say 75 plus) wearing a hat, was a shoo-in for worst driver of the year.

2.      Red-faced, overweight farmer types, with matching khakis to boot - Yes, these are all white males, usually with registration plates from some other province whose bakkies are due a major service and/or panel beating job.  Their obese frames and sluggish arm movements inhibit their ability to engage the ‘think quick – fast reflexes’ option whilst driving.  This makes for ominous travelling close to any one of them, where Joburg driving demands super-quick response times, if one is to survive the trip into work each morning.

3.      The overweight, middle-aged black woman with traditional head-gear squashed up against the car’s ceiling.  I generally try to avoid being on the same road with these drivers, and if possible, take alternative routes through adjacent suburbs.  They seem to be a combination of the first two in terms of overall ‘driving skill and awareness’.

4.      The minibus taxi driver – Yes the ‘what yellow line?’ brigade are the scourge of Joburg traffic, morning or afternoon.  Fair enough, not all are as bad as the rest – some manage to get their passengers to their destinations ... alive.

5.      Mr/Miss Slick – We all know them, the young-up-and-comings from Sandton and Melrose Arch who spend more money than they have to live a life of credit slavery to the bank of their choice, all in the name of the have-it-all image of course.  Their sporty cars wiz by at the speed of light, darting their way through rush-hour traffic.  But hell, they look SO good doing it (not really, but let’s play along ...).

6.      ??? –

Well let’s have it then.  Who’s your WORST driver on SA's roads?

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