What exactly is Heritage Day?
Finally, my computer makes a that familiar buzzing sound at 4pm on Friday the 21st September 2012. You may now safely switch off from work. The long weeekend has arrived, because the Minister of Useless Holidays declared a Heritage Day on Monday. Bless his cotton socks!
I did leave the office very confused tho I must admit. The debates about what I have planned for this significant day or the classic, "What part of the COLOURED Heritage are you celebrating"?, still lingers. How the heck should I know, considering the fact that I don't even know exactly what a COLOURED HERITAGE is. All I know is that it is the weekend with a bonus.
I am not going to go out and protest at the gates of Parlament about being confused or being left out. What I am going to do is silently protest and ponder this confusing day over Shesha Nyama and a crate of Black Label Quarts, as we coloureds do.
In fact, just to show my loyalty to this day, I'm going to remove my front teeth, dress in my swag Coon Carnival Costume and toyi-toyi on Camps Bay beach( not forgetting the Black Label Quartz). What is a protest without arming yourself properly.
The nice thing about Braai Day is that you don't have to invite me twice to your barbie, bbq, braai or shesha nyama. Any excuse to chomp on braai wors and lamb chops and pretend you got something to celebrate. The major sadness of my life is that i am in the heart of Jozies and as I stand there chatting(Chop in one hand, beer in the other), I am hoping that they at least a pool hidden somehwehere, just so I can catch a whif of chlorine. Anything to remind me that being from Cape Town means that the beach is right there.
Imagine years from now when we are all extinct and our existence is behind a glass wall in a museum. As the tourist reads the plaque. "COLOUREDS celebrating Heritage Day 2012", laughing with their front teeth lacking, guys sitting on Black Label crates, and then they forget to add the most important decor of all... Camps Bay Beach with the Table Mountain skyline in the back.
So to everyone else, who woke up singing the National Anthem on Heritage Day, I must admit, if I had to choose an anthem to celebrate with, i would mash-up "Make da circle bigger" with "Cheers to da freekin weekend, I'll dop to that".
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