PLEASE NOTE:

MyNews24 is a user-generated section of News24.com. The stories here come from users.

 
Spaceygirl
 
Comments: 11
Article views: 663
 
 
Latest Badges:



 
View all Spaceygirl's badges.
 

You know a survivor

31 July 2013, 12:41

Do you know a rape survivor? Chances that you do are pretty high.  Consider the facts:

·         The rate of sexual violence in South Africa is among the highest in the world.

·         A woman in South Africa is raped every 26 seconds,

·         One of four women in South Africa will be raped,

·         It is estimated that over 40% of South African women will be raped in their lifetime,

Most people take the term “rape survivor” to mean that the victim survived her rapist’s brutal attack.  It also means that the victim has survived herself.  In spite of the brutal attack on her person, on her dignity, on her self-esteem and on her psyche.  Rape leaves one battered emotionally as well as physically. In fact the emotional damage is far more long-lasting than the physical.  If she is brave enough to report the rape, she will be subjected to the indignity of invasive examinations which are themselves painful reminders of the actual deed.  If the charges lead to a court case the victim is subjected to a barrage of abuse from those who support her assailant as well as from possible press coverage. There will be those who blame her for the crime, she herself may experience feelings of guilt, blaming herself for her pain and anguish.  Telling herself that she was stupid…stupid to get drunk, to go out late at night, to be alone with him, to trust him, to allow him to hurt her, to not fighting back, to being not strong enough to fight back..….millions of excuses for his behavior may filter through her mind.  She may feel contaminated and constantly feel the need to ‘clean’ herself. If it happens early in childhood, she could develop severe emotional problems, including self harming, eating disorders, speech impediments and later on, addictions such as drug and alcohol dependency. She could block it out of her memory completely, having it resurface later on because it wasn’t dealt with at the time. There may be terrifying flashbacks that can be crippling in their intensity and at times she will feel that it is impossible to carry on, to live a normal life and to behave how people think she should.  It doesn’t matter how young she was when the rape occurs, it can come back to haunt her much later in life to the extent that it affects all her relationships.   She could be self destructive, suicidal, sometimes actually attempting suicide.  A rape survivor is not just some-one who has survived a brutal rape, it is some-one who has survived the barrage of her own mind and has tamed the demons in her head.

You know a survivor. Whether she is willing to admit it to you or not.  She could be your sister, your neighbor,  that annoying colleague, the facebook friend that you think is so funny. Rape survivors frequently hide their emotions from strangers, often coming across as completely whole people, able to function in normal society.  In the confines of their own mind, the reality is completely different.

Of course, it’s not just women and girls who are raped.  The rape of males may not be as prevalent but it happens and men are even more reticent to talk about it than women are.

You know a survivor.  If they do admit it to you, probably in confidence, it is because they trust you implicitly. Do not break that trust. Talk to them and support them because you may be the only person they have trusted with the information.

You know a survivor.  Don’t make ‘rape jokes’. To a rape survivor there is nothing worse than some-one being flippant about the most devastating event in their lives.  An event that affects almost everything they say and do.

You know a survivor.

Disclaimer: All articles and letters published on MyNews24 have been independently written by members of News24's community. The views of users published on News24 are therefore their own and do not necessarily represent the views of News24. News24 editors also reserve the right to edit or delete any and all comments received.
 

Read News24’s Comments Policy

24.com publishes all comments posted on articles provided that they adhere to our Comments Policy. Should you wish to report a comment for editorial review, please do so by clicking the 'Report Comment' button to the right of each comment.

Comment on this story
11 comments
Add your comment
Comment 0 characters remaining

Read more from our Users

Submitted by
Alan Solomon
Mind your language. Remember what...

History has shown how the most compelling political and religious leaders understood exactly why it is so important to speak to people in their mother tongue.  Read more...

0 comments 54 views
Submitted by
Kelvin Esiasa167
The amazing journey of Siyabulela...

One of South Africa's youngest innovators, Siyabulela Xuza, an energy-engineering Harvard University graduate, is passionate about harnessing the power of the sun for clean affordable energy. Read more...

1 comments 95 views
Submitted by
Jean da Cruz
Update on fire Betty's bay

I'm very grateful to the firefightes who have been very busy extinguishing the blaze at Betty's Bay even though the noise at times was unbearable. Read more...

1 comments 384 views
Submitted by
Deon George
SAPS air wing unit: Killing the c...

If you claim to care about the people, flora and fauna of SA, then best you read this. Read more...

50 comments 1304 views
Minister Nene you're destroying t...

With increase in tax you were unfair, not justified too ambitious. Read more...

10 comments 734 views
Submitted by
Moses Mbunge
Proteas win over West Indies

Congratulations to the Proteas for such a remarkable and outstanding victory. Read more...

8 comments 119 views

Jobs in Cape Town [change area]

Property [change area]

Travel - Look, Book, Go!

Kalahari.com - shop online today

Deal of the week!

Petrol generators from R1399, save up to R350. While stocks last. Shop now!

30% off Pampers!

Save 30% when you buy 3 or more selected pampers products. While stocks last. Shop now!

This week only - 30% off books!

Get 30% off when you buy 2 or more books. Many titles to choose from. While stocks last. Shop now!

New range of Samsung smartphones!

Samsung Galaxy A3, A5 and Alpha now available at kalahari.com. while stocks last. Shop now!

Buy 3 eBooks & only pay for 2!

The cheapest of the 3 titles will be free. Many more titles to choose from. While stocks last. Shop now!

 

services

E-mail Alerts The latest headlines in your inbox

RSS feeds News delivered really simply.

Mobile News24 on your mobile or PDA

E-mail Newsletters You choose what you want

News24 on your iPhone Get News24 headlines on your iPhone.

SMS Alerts Get breaking news stories via SMS.

Blogs Your opinion on you, me and everyone.

Calais Website keywords automated by OpenCalais.

 
Interactive Advertising Bureau
 
© 2015 24.com. All rights reserved.
There are new stories on the homepage. Click here to see them.
 
English
Afrikaans
isiZulu

Hello 

Create Profile

Creating your profile will enable you to submit photos and stories to get published on News24.


Please provide a username for your profile page:

This username must be unique, cannot be edited and will be used in the URL to your profile page across the entire 24.com network.

Settings

Location Settings

News24 allows you to edit the display of certain components based on a location. If you wish to personalise the page based on your preferences, please select a location for each component and click "Submit" in order for the changes to take affect.




Facebook Sign-In

Hi News addict,

Join the News24 Community to be involved in breaking the news.

Log in with Facebook to comment and personalise news, weather and listings.