PLEASE NOTE:

MyNews24 is a user-generated section of News24.com. The stories here come from users.

 
Bergie & Charles
 
Comments: 21
Article views: 794
 
 
Latest Badges:



 
View all Bergie & Charles's badges.
 

Zion vs Chuck Norris

26 October 2012, 11:44

Firstly, we have to state right up front that there’s simply no comparison between The Zee, and that wannabe poser, Chuck Norris. 

Chuck may have a string of c-grade movies under his black belt, but he’s yet to scale the heights of Table Mountain or the depths of Welkom’s, Gold Mine Shaft (just watch out for flying buckets of poo, Chuck).

The main differences between Zion and Chuck Norris are that Zion’s personality has more sides than an Octagon, Zion is more potent and the whole of Chuck’s Delta Force, and that Zion’s never been Missing in Action.

Indeed, to compare our very own Zion to Chuck Norris, would be like comparing a certain president to Ron Jeremy; the one’s a sex-mad performer whose bedded countless woman and who loves being on camera.  The other is, well, Ron Jeremy.

So let’s get to it then, our growing collection of Zionisms that make Chuck Norris look like the fifth member of the Teletubbies.

When Zion pushes snooze on his alarm clock, we all drift off to sleep.

When Zion puffs on a reefer, we all get stoned.

When Zion sends Santa a letter, we all get presents.

When Zion moon’s a passing car, the tides turn.

Zion’s appetite is so big that when he eats, nations go hungry.

It was Einstein who originally suggested dropping Zion on Hiroshima.

At the Olympics, Zion did the high jump, and never came down.

Zion never dials a wrong number, it’s only you who answers the wrong call.

Zion organised a small party once, when it was over, they called it Woodstock.

Do you know any others?  Let’s have them.

Disclaimer: All articles and letters published on MyNews24 have been independently written by members of News24's community. The views of users published on News24 are therefore their own and do not necessarily represent the views of News24. News24 editors also reserve the right to edit or delete any and all comments received.
 

Read News24’s Comments Policy

24.com publishes all comments posted on articles provided that they adhere to our Comments Policy. Should you wish to report a comment for editorial review, please do so by clicking the 'Report Comment' button to the right of each comment.

Comment on this story
21 comments
Add your comment
Comment 0 characters remaining

Read more from our Users

Submitted by
Aurangzeb Thabethe
EFF and its tactics

The events inside the parliamentary corridors weeks ago must worry all of us.  Read more...

40 comments 2591 views
Submitted by
Abioye Olufemi
The absolute way to take Christma...

As Christmas is coming soon, I am prompted to write this Christmas article for all of us here at News24. Read more...

4 comments 351 views
Submitted by
goldeelocks
Phiyega.....SAY WHAT?????

Clearly the Honourable Minister has abrogated the duty of the SAPS to protect the citizens of this country! What then is the purpose of the SAPS?  Read more...

11 comments 861 views
Submitted by
Paulus
Genealogy of Jesus, and the probl...

The new testament writers were so kind as to leave 2 genealogies of Jesus for us to peruse, both of his father. Read more...

225 comments 1953 views
Submitted by
Lee Grandmaison
Everyone is entitled to their own...

"Everyone is entitled to their own opinion." If you've ever seen or been in a debate, on or offline, you've heard this phrase quite a bit. Read more...

55 comments 552 views
Submitted by
johan609
South Africa heading South

We need to speak up. We need to take a stand. We need to take action. Read more...

26 comments 2648 views

Jobs in Cape Town [change area]

Property [change area]

Travel - Look, Book, Go!

Magical Massinga

Spend 5 nights at the gorgeous Massinga Beach Lodge in Mozambique and only pay for 4 from R13 220 per person sharing. Includes return flights, accommodation, transfers and romantic turndown. Book now!

Kalahari.com - shop online today

Pre-order your iPhone 6 at kalahari.com

Hurry and pre-order your own iPhone 6 now at SA’s favourite online store!

Bargain box – 60% off

Reduced prices, very limited stock. While stocks last. Hurry and shop now!

Mind blow low prices on electronics

Get either the Prestigio multiphone or Proline tablet 7” tablet for only R699. Offers valid while stocks last. Shop now!

30% off Barbie toys

Save 30% on all Barbie toys and accessories. Offer valid while stocks last. Shop now!

Baby extravanganza month at kalahari.com

Celebrate baby month with a wide range of awesome baby products. Offers valid while stocks last. Shop now.

OLX Free Classifieds [change area]

Samsung Galaxy s4

Mobile, Cell Phones in South Africa, Western Cape, Cape Town. Date October 24

Best bargain in big bay

Real Estate, Houses - Apartments for Sale in South Africa, Western Cape, Cape Town. Date October 25

VW Golf 6, 1.6 Trendline (Excellent condition)

Vehicles, Cars in South Africa, Western Cape, Cape Town. Date October 25

 

services

E-mail Alerts The latest headlines in your inbox

RSS feeds News delivered really simply.

Mobile News24 on your mobile or PDA

E-mail Newsletters You choose what you want

News24 on your iPhone Get News24 headlines on your iPhone.

SMS Alerts Get breaking news stories via SMS.

Blogs Your opinion on you, me and everyone.

Calais Website keywords automated by OpenCalais.

 
Interactive Advertising Bureau
 
© 2014 24.com. All rights reserved.
There are new stories on the homepage. Click here to see them.
 
English
Afrikaans
isiZulu

Hello 

Create Profile

Creating your profile will enable you to submit photos and stories to get published on News24.


Please provide a username for your profile page:

This username must be unique, cannot be edited and will be used in the URL to your profile page across the entire 24.com network.

Settings

Location Settings

News24 allows you to edit the display of certain components based on a location. If you wish to personalise the page based on your preferences, please select a location for each component and click "Submit" in order for the changes to take affect.








Facebook Sign-In

Hi News addict,

Join the News24 Community to be involved in breaking the news.

Log in with Facebook to comment and personalise news, weather and listings.